Why empath is a loveable slob

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Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Zyxst » 14 Jan 2011, 10:11

He brings me shiny pretties without prompting, like these:
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Bonus husband points: they actually *smell like roses*, unlike any of the other roses I've gotten, none of which had any scent at all.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Elomin Sha » 14 Jan 2011, 11:17

Girl: Oh Elomin where did you get these flowers they are lovely.
Elomin: I found them tied to a lamp post.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby TheRocket » 14 Jan 2011, 11:42

Super cute! I love the smell and look of roses. There are roses down here I have never seen before, they look almost like spotted easter eggs and they are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Alja-Markir » 14 Jan 2011, 23:23

Ya know, it's always bugged me. Floristry, that is.

I know, I know, even bringing this up instantly makes me an insensitive clod with no appreciation of romance, courtship, et cetera. But to me, cut flowers are depressing. I don't understand why people like them.

Okay, so flowers are symbols of life. They're delicate living things, gentle and beautiful, growing and blossoming, a sign of hope springing eternal, new life rising from the dearth of winter, that sort of thing.

Why, then, do we kill them?

We take these beautiful flowers and we cut them in half. We stick them in a sterile vase with enough water to keep the poor things "fresh". Then they slowly wither and die. And this is considered sweet, and thoughtful, and positive.

"Well Alja, what would you suggest instead?", you may be wondering.

Potted flowers.

They're the same symbol of life, but when potted they can actually remain alive. They can continue to grow, to flourish, to last for more than a week and a half, and in so lasting carry their symbolism of hope and life even further.

Instead we amputate our flowers. Then we hook them up to an IV, and we let them slowly bleed and starve to death. They eventually begin to literally decay from the wound upward. And then when their dried husks no longer please our sense of aesthetics, they are unceremoniously dumped into a rubbish pile.

/killjoy

~Alja~
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby TheRocket » 14 Jan 2011, 23:51

You do now, in order for a lot of bushes/flowers/trees to grow you HAVE to cut/thin them or else they will either choke the whole bush to death or the roots will not get enough sunlight or they could develop disease and pests from a rotting part.

I know this because I have scars all over my body from cutting fucking rose bushes for years to let them flourish in their environment and keep them alive.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby TheRocket » 14 Jan 2011, 23:52

Also, with that outlook you must be a vegetarian.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Alja-Markir » 14 Jan 2011, 23:57

I have no qualms about killing in order to consume. This applies to meat and cellulose alike.

Contrastingly, I have quite a few qualms about killing in order to decorate or to fulfil a social custom. This, again, applies to meat and cellulose alike.

If you give me flowers and expect me to be pleased, you should be overjoyed the next time a cat brings you a dismembered rodent carcass.

~Alja~

Addendum:

As for roses, they are only that way because humans bred them stupidly. Much the same can be said about most domesticated species.

Also, at least cats bring you gifts of corpses because they somewhat expect you to eat them.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Deedles » 15 Jan 2011, 01:45

I like both potted flowers and flower bouquets for different reasons.

Potted flowers are for giving your home some colour, the lovely fragrances, and because they just look beautiful.

I like flower bouquets because of the gesture when they're given, because of how you can arrange the flowers in beautiful combinations that you couldn't achieve with a potted flower, and because even when they have died, dried flowers (if done right) are also really beautiful.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby TheRocket » 15 Jan 2011, 01:53

Bad ju-ju!
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby the_lone_bard » 15 Jan 2011, 02:01

TheRocketSiobhan wrote:Bad ju-ju!


You rang?

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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby empath » 15 Jan 2011, 14:07

TheRocketSiobhan wrote:Bad ju-ju!

Good call. Time to collect on the Karma Tab™. *cracks knuckles*



WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT?



Who shit in YOUR cruelty-free Soylent Green People-Puffs™, Alja, that you gotta diss me MAKING MY WIFE HAPPY?!?

Nice Conclusion-Jumping™, genius; I didn't do it for some bullshit societal custom (she's not that crazy about roses usually BECAUSE they're so cliche), I did it BECAUSE SHE LIKED THEM.

You know, you MIGHT have figured that out if you'd GIVEN A SHIT about what the thread was ABOUT, instead of just posting your unrelated crap about 'the ills of humankind'. (For the record, I'm an adherent of that myself - see George Carlin's bit on the same issue, twit. Keep TK'ing while you're at it, too.)

Couldn't have let a minor little thing die off and disappear from the thread list, could ya? Couldn't let a minor poster make ONE tiny thread and thank another minor poster, and just let be nice for a short while and then fade away; HAD to tromp all over the pretty flower, didn't you?
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Wanna know WHY Zyxst doesn't post more over here? THIS shit is fucking why...



(and any goddamned mod who's gonna give ME shit about getting angry when someone rips ME apart in a thread ABOUT ME is gonna get an angry hand reaching across the continent to bitchslap him/her. I have not even STARTED yet.)
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby gcninja » 15 Jan 2011, 14:22

empath wrote:
TheRocketSiobhan wrote:Bad ju-ju!
SNIP

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He's just stating his philosphy on it, it's not like he bashed it or said its stupid.
Its like if I got somebody a bag of dead babies because thats why they liked and somebody in a thread said "I'm against this" I wouldn't snap, thats their outlook on it.
Last edited by gcninja on 15 Jan 2011, 15:31, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby The Jester » 15 Jan 2011, 15:05

Who is having cut roses hurting, Alja? Because unless it hurts someone, I got no problems. Sometimes you're right, man. Sometimes your wisdom is good, and useful. Sometimes, though? For a guy who likes saying he loves learning, you don't seem to be that good at people. I mean that in a general sense, here. You weren't to know that poking holes in empath's romantic gesture would make him explode. I wouldn'ta done it in public, though. :P

empath... I can see this has pissed you off. If you've had a particularly shitty day/week/fortnight/length of time I can see why you'd have a straw and camel moment, or if being romantic is a big deal to you (it is to me, man) and having someone come along (who I can tell you don't always agree with anyway, hell I don't either) and says negative things about what you've done.. I can see how you'd get upset too.
However.
Exploding over it in public and threatening peopel who aren't involved (and who actually do a fantastic and sometimes difficult job very fairly, on top of everything else they're busy with) isn't the way to deal with it.

Sure, you need a place to express the anger it's incited, but we have the Venting Thread for that. Any personal problems you feel you have to take up should be done by PM, dude (either to Alja, the mods, or both).


@GCNinja; Taking the piss out of an obviously very angry person isn't cool, man. Going ahead an also comparing their romantic gesture to dead babies is outta line.


It would be really awesome if everyone could keep their cool and talk this out. But I suspect that might be a bit much to ask. This is just kinda un-necessary, guys. All I'm sayin'.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Alja-Markir » 15 Jan 2011, 15:12

It's alright, I've come to expect this sort of response.

Empath, there is a difference between blunt critique and misanthropic cruelty. Someone can hold and even publicly express vastly different views from your own without insisting that your views are wrong.

I'm not about to tell anyone to stop doing the things that make them happy. Nor am I about to insult and degrade others without cause, nor those things which they hold dear. That would simply be arrogant, malicious, and irrational.

But I am perfectly willing to say things which cause people to question, or to think actively and critically about the everyday assumptions they make about their life and their world. It is neither a crime nor an evil to promote reflection and reconsideration. Even in public.

In truth, I consider it a boon to humanity to spur on introspection. I do it to myself, and I do it for others. We are lazy beings, creatures of habit and convenience. We believe and accept countless things simply because we are taught and trained to by our own cultures and the march of time.

So when I put forth a logical question as to why so many people in the world place value in something, and the only response I ever hear time and again is "How dare you question the thing which I hold dear? Why can't you just let people enjoy that which they value?", it troubles me. Not just flowers, but anything which I cannot see a logical reason for aside from tradition and familiarity.

I did not attack you, empath. I asked a question, perhaps a difficult one for you to address. If that upsets you, it would seem (at least to me) that you are less upset with me and more upset with the doubts and uncertainties such a line of questioning might raise.

~Alja~
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby gcninja » 15 Jan 2011, 15:31

The Jester wrote:@GCNinja; Taking the piss out of an obviously very angry person isn't cool, man. Going ahead an also comparing their romantic gesture to dead babies is outta line.


It would be really awesome if everyone could keep their cool and talk this out. But I suspect that might be a bit much to ask. This is just kinda un-necessary, guys. All I'm sayin'.


I meant no disrespect to him, its just the first thing that popped in my head, it could be replaced with anything, i.e.
Its like if I got somebody a dog/cat/ACER computer/-movie name- poster because thats why they liked and somebody in a thread said "I'm against this" I wouldn't snap, thats their outlook on it.


I'm just trying to get my point across. That being he stated and apparently questioned something, and empath exploded. He didn't diss or ridicule it but thats the way it was viewed apparently.
Last edited by gcninja on 15 Jan 2011, 15:35, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Theremin » 15 Jan 2011, 15:34

Alja-Markir wrote:Empath, there is a difference between blunt critique and misanthropic cruelty.


Exactly. One's being a pretentious arse, the other's being a spiteful dick.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby The Jester » 15 Jan 2011, 15:38

I really don't think suppressed guilt over some dying flowers is what bothered him, man. I think what bothered him was the way you stated opinion as fact, bluntly and abrasively, and re-painted his symbol of love and affection as a symbol of death, decay and human misanthropy.

You can broach hard subjects man, and I'm not saying you should stop. But this isn't one of them. This is a symbol and a gesture that has survived, not simply because it's a habit, but because it continues to resonate with people.

It's not about human laziness and it's not about you "simply asking a question". This is about your phrasing, and a rather bad reaction to it. If you tried a little more finesse and (haha) a little more empathy, maybe you wouldn't be seen as the aggressor so often?
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Alja-Markir » 15 Jan 2011, 15:44

I don't care what people see me for.

If people aren't going to put forth the effort to understand something different than themselves, that's their prerogative. I'm not about to pander to their expectations, and neither is the universe.

Personally, I would like to understand why people hold certain values that I myself do not. I would like to hear their rationales, their logical reasonings, and their truthful self analyses. Hence why I ask.

But almost always, instead of logic and reasons, I receive only anger and spite. It's a very human response, is it not?

~Alja~
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Theremin » 15 Jan 2011, 15:52

Alja-Markir wrote:If people aren't going to put forth the effort to understand something different than themselves, that's their prerogative. I'm not about to pander to their expectations, and neither is the universe.


You assume that if someone disagrees with your point, they must not have understood. That's a very pompous attitude.
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby empath » 15 Jan 2011, 16:02

Fuck this shit; apparently you're not allowed to have even one tiny little spot of niceness that isn't trampled with miserable shit.

Screw LRR; I'm gonna go visit /b/ - at least they only bring out the shitwagon in response to your attacks...
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Alja-Markir » 15 Jan 2011, 16:03

@Theremin

No, I assume that when people take a simple question as a personal affront, they are misunderstanding me.

@empath

Do you simply not want to believe that I in no way attacked you or your values? Because I've repeatedly pointed out, I have absolutely no problem with you holding your values, nor am I trying to destroy them.

I'd like to understand them is all.

~Alja~
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Theremin » 15 Jan 2011, 16:11

Q: Do you understand why people are angry with you?
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Alja-Markir » 15 Jan 2011, 16:14

A: I can only make assumptions based on my knowledge of human psychology.

Without their input I cannot know accurately why they are angry or upset, but I can make decent deductions. Most of those deductions have to do with human tendencies toward irrational emotionality.

~Alja~
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Theremin » 15 Jan 2011, 16:17

Q: Why do you think they are angry with with you?
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Re: Why empath is a loveable slob

Postby Alja-Markir » 15 Jan 2011, 16:24

A: I can't speak with accuracy, but I would imagine it is because I questioned something they valued and they interpreted such critical analysis as a personal attack.

Humans are amazingly protective of their core values, and strikingly enough they are even more protective of those notions for which they have the least evidence.

To question something fundamentally dear to someone who does not readily understand why they value what they do is disorienting, confusing, and makes them doubt themselves. They begin to realize they have little rational basis for their belief, or if they do they cannot consciously bring it to mind. This uncertainty induces psychological panic, sets off instinctual self preservation mechanisms. A small portion of their very reality has just been undermined. This is psychologically threatening and frightening.

In this fear, it is quite natural to react with emotion and violence, typically anger. The doubt instills a sort of mental pain or trauma, a wound of sorts that the sufferer will attempt to protect from further harm, and whose source the sufferer will attempt to escape or destroy.

Put more bluntly, if you do something (intentionally or not) to make a dog feel threatened, be wary of it's bite.

~Alja~

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