The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

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Elomin Sha
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Elomin Sha » 16 Jan 2015, 15:37

Probably using a sandblaster or something.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Elomin Sha » 17 Jan 2015, 13:30

In a strung out comical conversation with a female coworker about relationships and putting myself down. I told her I couldn't have sex with her. "What do you mean you won't have sex with me?" Although it was all in mirth she seemed a little taken a back in her voice that someone would say that to her.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Lord Hosk » 17 Jan 2015, 21:49

I met someone like you before, their name was...

Wait, no that was you.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Elomin Sha » 18 Jan 2015, 04:10

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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Elomin Sha » 29 Jan 2015, 12:07

I keep having the same idea that runs through my head for a few days. For some reason it is appealing then the idea goes away from sight and mind fore a few weeks, and then it comes back. The cycle repeats. Is this a normal fixation to have, it's getting slightly annoying now.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Atifexe » 29 Jan 2015, 12:53

Repetitive/cyclical fixations are pretty normal, in my personal experience. It's difficult to say more without knowing what you're referring to, but I'm inclined to say don't be worried about it.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Elomin Sha » 29 Jan 2015, 13:27

Roger. There's nothing bad I was just curious. I like repeating things like grinding in RPGs but this just bugs me. Trying to work out how to deal with it.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Bebop Man » 20 Feb 2015, 18:52

At least you get XP.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Elomin Sha » 21 Feb 2015, 01:26

Negative EXP.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Bebop Man » 21 Feb 2015, 05:20

Are there games with "negative XP"?
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Senstaku » 21 Feb 2015, 07:15

D-do we need to take Elomin to flirting bootcamp?

I used to think I couldn't flirt, but then I got married and was told by my wife that I flirt all the time without realizing it. Apparently just being friendly, cracking jokes, and enjoying a woman's company without overtly demanding sex counts as flirting.

Or maybe it just does when Italians do it. Those of us with Mediterranean heritage are very passionate people :)
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Elomin Sha » 21 Feb 2015, 07:49

The only flirt line I know is the Joey Tribianni: "How you doin'?"

I do not know how to flirt. I am just nice and I listen.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Avistew » 21 Feb 2015, 11:08

Bebop Man wrote:Are there games with "negative XP"?


Well, there are games where some actions cost XP. D&D comes to mind.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Elomin Sha » 21 Feb 2015, 11:16

Maybe WOW or Diablo.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Elomin Sha » 04 Mar 2015, 15:26

The Know just put this up and its kind of interesting and strange (Strange that it was done anyway). 15,000 men from around the world had their members measured to find out what a 'more' reliable penile length. Turns out the avera is 5.1 inches.

Kind of an interesting read, went for it to see how long until I started giggling like a school boy who heard the word bum. Didn't take long.

Link - http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1 ... 13010/full

Foot size has no correlation.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Elomin Sha » 27 Mar 2015, 10:00

Went to watch a Let's Play and the pre-roll advert was for a site called journl and it made no bones about it of having coverd softcore sex. First time I've seen an overt advert like that where the acts are being done.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby gcninja » 05 Apr 2015, 01:17

So... met girl, had date, fun talks. Relationship stuff aside, sex for is scary in that it can make or break a realtionship, there's pregnancy, and the emotional attachment.

Talking with her she seems...hardened on how mandatory it is to be dece in bed. It's been five years for me or abouts there and I'm not sure I'm up to par. Post talk with her about this on phone I've considered maybe investing in a toy for practice. I was wondering if
A) anybody could shed light on how to handle this situation
B) tips on out of practice and working up to actual sex
C) tips on handling a girl who likes sex, and when gets it wants it to be porn quality, or at least holds guys to porn star standards (yes she's had sex in the past and it's been good apparently)
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Duckay » 05 Apr 2015, 02:27

Does "dece" mean something different than what I think? I wouldn't think "dece in bed" and "porn quality" are synonyms typically, hence why I ask.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby gcninja » 05 Apr 2015, 02:31

Oh, well I typed that in a huff, but yeah, she wants porn quality from what I surmised from our talk. I don't mean just decent, but rather very, very, very good. sorry about that
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby AdmiralMemo » 05 Apr 2015, 03:37

Despite being someone who is still a virgin and has not used sex toys, I would say that you could read the Matthew-led comics of Oh Joy Sex Toy if you want to find toys to invest in. From what I've read, they seem to discuss the ins and outs (pun intended) of sex toys very thoroughly.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby My pseudonym is Ix » 05 Apr 2015, 11:12

Seconded Memo's suggestion. I read OJST for art first, education second and purchasing advice not at all, but they seem to have their head well screwed on (pun also intended) and know what they're talking about.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Avistew » 05 Apr 2015, 16:07

Duckay wrote:Does "dece" mean something different than what I think? I wouldn't think "dece in bed" and "porn quality" are synonyms typically, hence why I ask.


I'm with you here. To me "porn quality" means "bad" when you're female, because porn tends to depict thoughtless sex of a kind meant to look good to the (usually male) audience but guys who actually act that way tend to be super lousy in bed because they think they know some kind of perfect formula and aren't receptive to any feedback or variation from the "script".

My advice is to ask what kind of stuff she likes and then do it. There can't be any formula of "do this and you'll be great in bed" because a woman's "great in bed" is the next one's "terrible in bed". Women have varying tastes and there is no way we can predict hers. Talk before, during and after sex and you'll know what to do to please her specifically, which will be way more useful to you than any advice about what "most" women may like. There is no way to know where she fits and she's the only one you care about right now.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby gcninja » 06 Apr 2015, 01:37

Yeah, she was having a few beers last night and is kinda a light weight apparently. We talked more tonight and I did bring up "You want porn star sex" and it delved into, yeah but no. We understand it's messy, laughing, and not perfect. So there's more to what she wants than just that. Still, I'm worried I wont provide being it's been so long.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Jamfalcon » 06 Apr 2015, 08:30

I think your best bet is just let her know how long it's been, that you may not be at your peak potential right off the bat, and just relax so you can both enjoy yourselves. If she's a reasonable person, that's an entirely valid thing to say and shouldn't be a dealbreaker.
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Re: The Sex Thread 2: Because Two Hands Are Better Than One

Postby Elomin Sha » 06 Apr 2015, 08:55

Jamfalcon wrote:I think your best bet is just let her know how long it's been,


That'll be an awkward conversation for me.
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