The depressing depression thread

[My pseudonym is Ix]

I never did hear back about that job. I had my hopes up so high and now I'm just thinking about what I probably did wrong on the test to make them not respond.
I'm getting increasingly unhappy being here. Some friends of mine are willing to rent me a room, but it won't be until January and I need to get a job so I can pay rent.
I spent a good portion of the day yesterday getting groceries and cleaning for everyone, so I wanted to relax last night and take my mind off things. I decided to bring up the Desert Bus feed and chat for a bit. I managed to make it for the Grant Imahara call. Of course, that turned out to be a bad idea, because they caught me watching it and started ridiculing me for "watching a bunch of people sit around a room" even after I tried to explain to them what it was.
It's clear to me now that I live with a bunch of immature, inconsiderate slobs.

Trying to 'explain what it really is' is not a viable way of dealing with such issues, partly because these kind of people aren't interested but mostly because it does not address the source of their insult. For example, when people (gently) take the piss out of me for doing historical re-enactment (which is, fundamentally, LARPing), I counter by asking if they got to spend their Sunday beating the shit out of each other with sticks and steel. This addresses the insult, which is based around the perceived stupidity and not-actually-fun-ness of the activity, by explaining precisely why it is such good fun to me (and any other right-minded human being).
Doesn't mean you should be expected to stand for their bullshit, but it's still a thing worth practicing and understanding in order to correctly counter insults along that line.
Hard luck with the job man. Sometimes, shit just happens.

[Elomin Sha]

Say to them, are you raising hundreds of thousands of dollars for a children's charity?

[NebulosDisconcertion]

That you-know-the-part of Desert Bus has me all messed up.
I don't know why, I'm not used to feeling like this, even at times when I 'should'.

[Elomin Sha]

Don't know that part.

[Jamfalcon]

Don't know that part.

Check your PMs.

[Wolfwood723]

That you-know-the-part of Desert Bus has me all messed up.
I don't know why, I'm not used to feeling like this, even at times when I 'should'.

I know how you feel. The whole Feels hour was very emotional. I had to fight not to cry.

Then the huge gains in cash and now its all over once again and I am once again very sad.

[Psycat Aurora]

I have been feeling the lowest I've ever felt the past few days. It's been very difficult to get through and I was legitimately worried for my own well being for a while.
But I've had some support. I was even treated to dinner and a show tonight. I'm not completely back to normal yet. I still have a lot of things bothering me and I'm still very deeply depressed. But I'm trying.

[AdmiralMemo]

Post-Desert Bus depression kicking in, though receiving my prizes will probably abate that.

[Duckay]

I've been feeling really down for the past couple of days. Not really depressed, or anything like that, just... down. I noticed it in particular today, but then I thought back over the past few days and I realized that I've been in "oh my God everyone is judging me for everything" mode pretty badly.

There's a couple of things that have contributed to set it off but right now I am torn between knowing that I need to do something to get my mind off it and not feeling motivated enough to go and do anything.

[Lord Chrusher]

I am feeling pretty low right now. I am stressed about job applications that due at the end the week. I am also having mixed and uncertain feelings about a female friend. To top it off I am still recovering from a cold.

[Fezzul]

I know the feeling Duckay, I've been feeling that way a lot recently. I've been trying to find a neutral place so that I can calm it down and look at it from an unbiased, calm perspective. I think I'll get it in a couple of weeks. I'll be leaving the States for the first time in nearly a year, visiting my parents for Christmas. Still feeling a bit down right now though.

It hasn't helped that my money has been tight recently, money always depresses me. Rather, the lack of it. I had to pay out a lot more than expected on leaving my last apartment, and setting new apartment up has had its expenses too. And it's not like I live a ridiculously extravagant lifestyle. My vices are sugar and alcohol, and while I did a little bit more of the latter than I expected this month, it was till by no means bank account crippling.

Got to keep focusing on the positive. I'm still relying on financial help a LOT less than I was this time last year. I'm making my own money. I'm always working or looking for work.

One of the actual problems is: people owe me money right now. I'm owed 300 dollars from the show that I did. If I had that, I would be covered for the next little while.

Especially given the looming specter of Christmas presents, money is just getting me down a lot right now. I'm being frugal as it is, and it's still looking tough.

I guess that's what I get for living in New York.

Anyway, got to keep moving. Only way forward.

[nicholasmc1]

I just left a hour party early because I don't know why... these freak outs are getting weird and scary.

[Ptangmatik]

Oh man, I recently hopped over a wall into a cow field to quietly escape a wedding and went home to lie down on the grass staring at the stars for a few hours. I was fairly drunk, but I'm used to occasionally quietly excusing myself before I start freaking out

[My pseudonym is Ix]

Oh man, I recently hopped over a wall into a cow field to quietly escape a wedding and went home to lie down on the grass staring at the stars for a few hours. I was fairly drunk, but I'm used to occasionally quietly excusing myself before I start freaking out

Hey, it's better than goin twitchy in front of people

[Fezzul]

I've done similar things before.

Maybe it's the extreme tiredness talking, but I'm feeling down again.

By all accounts, it's not been a shitty day. I had a lot of work in the morning, out in the cold and rain. Which isn't the funnest thing to do, but it's going to get me money that will help see me through. I got commissioned with real monies to write a short film script, which is awesome, and I had my improv rehearsal, which was good.

Actually, I know what it is. It's fucking thanksgiving. It always fucks me up. I have no reason to celebrate thanksgiving. I never have, it's not an English thing. But since living in America it has depressed me. Because around this time of year, everyone starts talking about seeing their families, and their loved ones, and on thanksgiving all my good friends leave town and go and do family stuff, and feel like I'm all on my own.

Coupled with my ever crappy love-life, it adds up to a pretty lonely feeling.

I need my holiday...

[TheRocket]

I wish to give the world a hug.

[nicholasmc1]

The world accepts

[Elomin Sha]

I object.

[Keab42]

*Hugs Elomin anyway*

[Elomin Sha]

Contempt of Court! Contempt of Court!

[My pseudonym is Ix]

Feeling pretty damn shitty right now: tired, angry, stressy about sorting out housing for next year, but above all lonely and insecure. Again

[Dutch guy]

I never did hear back about that job. I had my hopes up so high and now I'm just thinking about what I probably did wrong on the test to make them not respond.

I know it's a bit late, but this just caught my eye. Keep the following in mind. There is NOTHING you can do wrong on a test to make them not respond. What often happens with these things is that the HR manager just gets a "Were looking for X people fitting profile X". Here's a bunch of tests from candidates. This manager then just starts working down the pile until he has the required number of people. This is often just one person, meaning the first one who is even remotely qualified gets invited for follow-up. The rest goes into a drawer somewhere. If the person (possibly after a second or third pass down the stack) is hired, the rest of the stack is just dumped to the trashcan and not even looked at.

This is unfortunately how recruitment works these days. No answer is all the answer you are going to get. And if an even remotely qualified shit-for-brains is in the pile ahead of you, you're often out of luck.
Just keep trying. At some point you're going to be the lucky one.

[Lord Hosk]

Paul, if you are reading this, I just want to say again, Good job stepping up and asking for help and letting people know you have trouble sometimes. I can tell you from my own struggles that that is the most difficult part and I have to force myself to keep saying it out loud or I close myself off again.

You and the group you have assembled both LRR and the Runners have helped me so much. I think I speak for everyone when I say, Thanks for sharing, and if you ever need to let it out, it sounds cheesy but, this is a safe place, and we are here to hear you too if you want it.

[Paul]

Thanks Lord Hosk, that means a lot.

Even though I don't post in the forums that much, I do read them. There are many forums where a thread like this one could not exist, or would be ridiculed and it gives me great pride to see that the community that has grown up around LRR is so understanding and compassionate. That you all choose to identify yourselves as fans our work makes me feel as if we are doing something right

[JustAName]

Yeah, what Hosk said. You may have seen me post this before, but my first PAX, I was very nervous and the LRR meetup was a big thing, so of course it was busy and I wasn't putting myself forward, but you talked to me and asked me about myself, and were quite personable, and that's always stuck with me. You made me feel like I belonged there, so thanks for that.

And I can send you a copy of the page to cut out if you need it. It's a 3D puzzle, actually. There's folding!