The depressing depression thread

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fantôme
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby fantôme » 23 Jan 2016, 15:49

Jamfalcon wrote:I know there were probably a lot of people (myself included) who saw his post after others had replied and didn't know what to add, but were concerned about him. I don't know what's best in this situation, but I have been wondering whether he was okay ever since reading that post...


Very much this. Though I ended up not saying anything, my thoughts and best wishes are with him and his family.
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Arclight_Dynamo
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Arclight_Dynamo » 23 Jan 2016, 21:38

I was wondering what had happened, too. Thanks for reaching out, Fayili. This is awful, but I suppose he's where he needs to be right now. :(

To Mister Blue Sky/Aaron and his mother:

I know this is probably one of the darkest moments of your lives right now. But there are a lot of people in this thread who have dealt with similar issues and been in similar places (I myself have major depressive disorder and anxiety disorders). I think most of us can say that while it may not seem like it right now, this is absolutely a thing that can be managed. It can get so, so much better.

It isn't easy, but you can get through this. Both of you.

Know that there are people here who are keeping you in our thoughts. There are people who care.
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Danielle Pepin
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Danielle Pepin » 24 Jan 2016, 00:24

Thank you, Fayili. I was worried and now I'm relieved he's still alive and therefore not too late for help to reach him. I'd like to be able to communicate the following in case he missed seeing some of it or misinterpreted chat's responses to his words. I hope his mother may find some comfort from our words also.

Mister Blue Sky, our IRC community has many people in it from all different backgrounds and you may be pleased to find once you've tried it for a while that there are likely some that have had or are having similar feelings as you regularly. Some of them have found methods of managing on chat and some are helping others out of the dark situations they themselves were once in. And when I say all different backgrounds there's a wide range of different genders (including trans), orientations, ages, health conditions (some people with chronic and/or terminal illness) and even people who have no readily apparent underlying reasons for their depression. (Please keep watch for the updates to the new chat server information which will be posted to the forum's depression thread once that is known.)

I know myself that depression/anxiety has a way of making things seem impossible and sometimes even make mundane tasks overwhelming but getting better can happen with help. As long as you are breathing there's always possibilities for positive changes.

Twitch chat may also be a bit fast moving at times for people to be noticed when they are trying to reach out too, and we are sorry if your attempts on there were overlooked. I wanted to reply to you the last time I saw your words in the LRR stream but you'd already left by the time I saw them. I also heard that you were going to stream and hope that is still something you plan to do. I'll join in watching if my schedule allows it and you still plan to.
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Dubious_wolf
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Dubious_wolf » 24 Jan 2016, 02:51

I haven't posted in a while. But I really need to just vent. So I'm glad this thread was near the top when I needed it. (However it sucks that this thread has fresh posts because we all deserve to be happy)
I have a friend who is going through a lot of stuff. He's dealing with depression, and some self destructive behaviors that go with it and attention seeking. He went for treatment and I've had long, intimate conversations with him. I thought he was in a good position but after tonight I've realized he hasn't hit the point where he wants to change.

He doesn't want to accept responsibility and act like an adult. Because we're millennials and adulting is hard fucking work. I can't handle it. I can't handle some ones emotional psychological bs when they aren't open to change. If you say one thing and do another your are lying to yourself and I can't help you until you help yourself.

At some point I will be telling him this. But this post is helping to crystallize my thoughts.
Thanks. The LRR community has always been so good.the reason I haven't been on here is life has been really busy (in a good way)
Anyway no need to respond, I just needed some space to jot down how I'm feeling.
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Phi
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Phi » 24 Jan 2016, 03:57

Thank you for sharing, Dubious Wold. I hope your friend grows.

There is a book called Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. the title sounds rather cheesy, but it is not a self-help book. I suggest you google it, as it may help your friend gain some perspective.
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Avistew » 24 Jan 2016, 06:22

Thanks for letting us know, Fayili, it's a relief to hear he's still alive and I hope he will get better. Send my support to him and his mom and the rest of his family. Looking forward to having him back after he feels better.
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Elomin Sha » 24 Jan 2016, 10:49

Wow, that's a real bugger. Hopefully, Blue Sky will get better.
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby AdmiralMemo » 24 Jan 2016, 14:46

Phi wrote:Thank you for sharing, Dubious Wold. I hope your friend grows.

There is a book called Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. the title sounds rather cheesy, but it is not a self-help book. I suggest you google it, as it may help your friend gain some perspective.
I have the sequel, The Will to Meaning, but every time I've tried to crack it open, I can never get through the first chapter. I'm hoping the first book isn't as dry and obtuse.
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Danielle Pepin
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Danielle Pepin » 24 Jan 2016, 15:31

The new IRC server info for the desert bus community is irc.dbcommunity.org/6697 #desertbus so welcome all and let us know if you have troubles connecting on your IRC client software.
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Danielle Pepin
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Danielle Pepin » 24 Jan 2016, 15:35

Avistew wrote:Thanks for letting us know, Fayili, it's a relief to hear he's still alive and I hope he will get better. Send my support to him and his mom and the rest of his family. Looking forward to having him back after he feels better.


I look forward to talking to him even if he isn't feeling better but still hoping he will feel better from knowing we care.


Dubias_Wolf, there's not wanting to change yet (true it's very hard to help before that turning point) but there's also wanting it but being unable to do the steps from lack of energy or lack of seeing what will work yet. Need to keep in mind that what someone not currently in a depressed state has a tone more energy and sees things more clearly to be able to grasp at the help that's out there. Hard to do that when you feel like you can't get out of bed or the thought of leaving the house is still overwhelming you. I hope they do reach that point of wanting help even if they can't seem to keep a solid grasp on it. I'm reminded of the drowning analogy Mikey Neumann posted on his blog being quite accurate. Down a well with slippery walls and hard as you wish you had a foothold you can't see anything until your serotonin level somehow allows you to.
Last edited by Danielle Pepin on 24 Jan 2016, 15:57, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Master Gunner » 24 Jan 2016, 15:35

For now, http://zetashift.dbcommunity.org will let you connect through the browser. We're just in the process of getting that working on the main address too.
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Deedles » 25 Jan 2016, 02:30

I'm glad to hear that Blue Sky is alive, and relieved to know that his mother seems very supportive and understanding, since that means at least someone is there to keep an eye on him IRL, I was scared that no one was.

I just... yeah, words are hard to come by today for me, so I'll leave it at that.
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Avistew » 25 Jan 2016, 02:40

Danielle Pepin wrote:I look forward to talking to him even if he isn't feeling better but still hoping he will feel better from knowing we care.


True! I didn't want to sound like I expected him to come back here right away and was trying to say that he can take all the time he needs. Not that he isn't welcome until he feels better! Thanks for pointing this out so I could clarify :)
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Tinasaur
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Tinasaur » 26 Jan 2016, 14:01

I can't cope with my everyday life at this point and I'm making bad decisions trying to escape the pain and anxiety.
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Danielle Pepin
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Danielle Pepin » 26 Jan 2016, 23:31

Tinasaur wrote:I can't cope with my everyday life at this point and I'm making bad decisions trying to escape the pain and anxiety.


If you want to elaborate or talk about it, here is good place. There's pm if you prefer too.



Was just talking to someone earlier about coping strategies and remembered I've learned a few that can help with anxiety. Best thing about both of these is you can do them almost anywhere even if people are around you without it making it obvious that you are doing something out of the ordinary.

One is a "grounding exercise" you can do when you feel a panic attack coming on or during one. Start naming objects around you (can be just silently thinking the names), "table, chair, laptop, wall, cupboard, mirror...etc." Keep naming them until you feel calmer or until the attack has passed. It works best if you yourself a position which feels physically stable (not moving preferably though it will work in a car). The purpose of this is to get your mind to focus outside of yourself instead of what's happening inside you and the anxious feeling. Focusing too much on the anxious feeling tends to only make things feel worse, therefore anything you can do to bring that focus outside of yourself will help.

There's also a pressure point thing someone taught me for things like test anxiety but it can work with probably any sort of anxiety as long as you have hands and a means of pinching...This is to pinch the fleshy bit by the web that is between your thumb and index finger, and hold it until you start feeling a sense of calm. It supposed to stimulate your body's chemistry for both pain relief and sensations of calmness. As to weather or not this is true or just a placebo sort of thing I'm no doctor to confirm but it has helped me when I've done it.

Pressure point reference images:
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Phi
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Phi » 27 Jan 2016, 04:28

Yesterday I sent my application of art studies in Finland, after working on my tasks and portfolio for a few weeks. I felt excited. I smiled and gave my rat a kiss.
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Elomin Sha
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Elomin Sha » 27 Jan 2016, 04:34

Mental note: don't kiss Phi. He may be suffering from the buboes.
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Phi » 27 Jan 2016, 04:42

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Elomin Sha
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Elomin Sha » 27 Jan 2016, 04:44

It's staring into my soul, oh wait, I don't have one. I'm safe!
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Danielle Pepin
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Danielle Pepin » 28 Jan 2016, 09:36

Phi, cute! What's her name?
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Phi
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Phi » 28 Jan 2016, 09:49

Tundra Lysefjorda Atratus. Or just Tundra :)
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RytelCSF
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby RytelCSF » 28 Jan 2016, 17:20

I've been drinking heavily much more frequently than usual lately. I don't necessarily want to, but when I'm drunk is basically the only time that I don't feel like a worthless piece of shit.

I don't like this, but I also don't dislike it enough to change. I've been making sure to only drink at my house and to not leave for the rest of the night, just to make sure I don't endanger anyone else, but I'm not convinced that makes it much better.
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Dutch guy » 30 Jan 2016, 07:53

Fuckity fucking fuckering fuckety fuckin' FUCK Image
THE DUTCH!! THE DUTCH AGAIN!!!!!
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby My pseudonym is Ix » 30 Jan 2016, 09:43

Sup Dutch?
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Re: The depressing depression thread

Postby Tinasaur » 31 Jan 2016, 08:29

Thank you for the advice Danielle Pepin. I should talk about my problems, it's just hard not to judge myself right now and that makes it difficult opening up.

RytelCSF, I feel for you. Though alcohol isn't my drug of choice I feel we're in similar situation of having problems dealing with reality. I don't know what to say other than that since I'm not really solving my own issues, but at least you're not alone.

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