LRRcast for cHustle ep.6 - viral

[Terin]

Man, I must have some of the greatest cats in the world. They're incredibly friendly and love to sit on my bed or get close to me. Of course, two of them are Ragamuffins, but the other two, a tabby and a short-haired black and white kitten... ish... cat, are also very friendly. There's only one cat I can think of out of a huge streak of about twenty or so that was pretty mean, but that's it.

Oh. A LRRcast. How about that. Yeah! It's like the radio on the intertubes! Datasheets! Spreadabases! Stuff like that.

[Cake]

I hate cats. They stink. They aren't fun to play with, and they can be really mean.

[Cake]

Excerpts From A Dog's Diary

Day number 181
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 pm - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 182
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
1:30 pm - ooooooo. bath. bummer.
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 pm - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Excerpts From A Cat's Diary

Day 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another
houseplant.

Day 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.

DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it includeda burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.

DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer". Moreimportantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured.

But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

[Matt]

I'm not arguing the cat person/dog person point here, but Matt, you weren't "playing with" or even "manhandling" her cats, you were outright harassing them. You deserve those scars.

the point still stands tha in 14 years of harassment I never got a permanent scar from my dog, but in 14 minutes of harassment of the cats I ended up bleeding.

-m

[Master Gunner]

If Kathleen's cats attacked you, either you produce the same effect in cats that Klingons produce in tribbles, or you did something to deserve it. No offense to, but of all the cats I've known, the only ones that would needlessly attack people were those that experienced a traumatic incident as a kitten (the same kind that would turn a dog nasty for life), and/or were raised by somebody....pretty much the exact opposite of Kathleen (or at least, what I know of Kathleen, which admittedly is pretty little, but I can't imagine she'd be the type to produce that type of cat).

The last cat I knew that scratched me without provocation or by accident (such as me going at my timid cat with scissors to try and get all her knots out, or either of them climbing on to my chest after climbing up the couch) was one we got from the SPCA, who was rescued from an utterly abusive household, which makes it hard to blame him. Other cats we've adopted from abuse or abandonment though have learned to be much better tempered, he was just an oddball.

I know you're not a cat person Matt, but you're also not a country person. Doesn't stop you from liking Corb Lund.

[Cake]

My dad's wife has a cat. That cat loves my dad a lot. My dad hates the cat. When the cat when missing for while, and came back all knotted, my step-sister shaved the cat bald. The cat got so mad AT MY DAD that he wasn't there to stop the shavening, that the cat went and pooped in both of my dad's shoes.

[Lyinginbedmon]

Excerpts From A Dog's Diary

Day number 181
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 pm - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 182
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
1:30 pm - ooooooo. bath. bummer.
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 pm - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Excerpts From A Cat's Diary

Day 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another
houseplant.

Day 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.

DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it includeda burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.

DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer". Moreimportantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured.

But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

Epicly done good sir.

[Cybren]

I'm not arguing the cat person/dog person point here, but Matt, you weren't "playing with" or even "manhandling" her cats, you were outright harassing them. You deserve those scars.

the point still stands tha in 14 years of harassment I never got a permanent scar from my dog, but in 14 minutes of harassment of the cats I ended up bleeding.

-m

You know there's more recorded deaths of dogs killing people (especially children) that coyotes and timber wolves, right?

edit: and uhm, who the hell shampoo's a cat? They have rough sandpapery tongues for a reason

[Lyinginbedmon]

edit: and uhm, who the hell shampoo's a cat? They have rough sandpapery tongues for a reason

Yes, stripping meat from the bones of prey.

[Master Gunner]

And for grooming. However, some longhairs have problems where their tongue and saliva are not enough to break the knots, since they originated in Africa and that area, they evolved with fairly short hair, and the tools to take care of that. However, shampooing should not be needed if you brush them on a regular basis (although a washing should be in order every once in a while, especially if it's an outdoor cat).

[Matt]

You know there's more recorded deaths of dogs killing people (especially children) that coyotes and timber wolves, right?

that's an invalid comparison for a variety of reasons, the most crippling of which is that people don't keep undomesticated timberwolves and coyotes as housepets.

I guarantee you that if they did, there would be a VASTLY larger number of deths attributed to wolvs than to domesticated dogs.

also, if you factor out pit bulls, rotweilers, dobermans and german shepherds out of the "dog" category (the first three because they're large, aggressive, unpredictable and poor family pets, the GS's because they're large, highly intelligent, easily trainable, and therefore freqently used by police as attack dogs) the number of injuries and deaths would also be significantly reduced.

Understand, that when I say "dog" I mean the typical, family friendly golden retriever or lab. these dogs are bred specifically for temperment and behavior. they are, quite literally, "ideal" pets. You;d be hard pressed to find a death attributed to one of these dogs that wasn't related to an accident, protection of it's family, or a result of HORRIBLE mistreatment.

-m

[Cybren]

Right, exactly, "good tempered dogs are good tempered" is your point and it's tautological. Cats are good tempered as well, but if you try to treat a two pound cat the same way you do a forty pound dog, you might be in for a surprise. And you admit to manhandling it.

[Kdz]

This is sort of the other end of what I was getting at earlier: Some dogs aren't good as pets. It's in their genes to be aggressive and what have you. Not every dog can be a hunting dog, not every dog is good with kids, not every dog could be a scent dog. That sort of thing.

I have little doubt there is something similar with cats, but I don't know much about them. I'm sure some cats (aside just from individual aspects) in general wouldn't be good pets.

[Sarah]

The best parts of Things On My Head are the descriptions? The videos have no personality? Oh come now. How can you ignore the sheer brilliance (and, of course, gorgeousness) of the videos themselves? I'd say they're full of personality, my friend and I agree that they're very 'Paul.'

That said, the descriptions are thoroughly amusing. I love the whole concept. Also, I second the suggestion of having an annotation on your head.

I've also enjoyed borington.com, which I suppose is contrary to its purpose. Paul, we need another phone book podcast!

About the endless reposting of Nunchuck Fail: I think at least some of them were done by people who found the video elsewhere and decided to post it to Youtube without checking to see if it was already there. Some of them seem to be the shorter version from break.com.
That, or they just want the attention.

As for podcast quality: I can hear it and understand what you're saying, so it's all good.

...We now return you to the extensive discussion of household pets, already in progress.

[Kdz]

I think it's the descriptions to Things on My Head that really give the videos life. It gives them a story. It draws you in and makes you want to know more about this mysterious guy who puts things on his head. You start making inferences about his motivations, his dreams, his life, his background, etc.

It makes him a more fully-fleshed, rounder character, as opposed to some face on the screen with an object on his head. It's an insight into his life, and that's a big draw in entertainment: connection.

And that's my overwrought analysis for the week. What will next week's be? Tune in and find out!

[Matt]

Right, exactly, "good tempered dogs are good tempered" is your point and it's tautological. Cats are good tempered as well, but if you try to treat a two pound cat the same way you do a forty pound dog, you might be in for a surprise. And you admit to manhandling it.

That all may be true. It doesn't make your pervious argument any less invalid.

-m

[Sarah]

I won't argue that the descriptions don't give the videos character. I just think the videos have their own merit apart from the descriptions. It's hard to describe what I like so much about them, especially since they aren't very eventful. But the concept of them and the duration (a minute twenty with almost no variation) make it amusing, as does his lack of expression. I think it also helps if you're already familiar with Paul, because I think it really does suit his character. It's original and silly and fun.

Having already known these were set up when I first encountered them, I haven't really looked at the comments as insights into a mysterious person. It's not that mysterious to me (maybe it should be?). I can see what you're saying, though, and someone without know prior knowledge might go through that process. I certainly agree that the descriptions lend character and reveal more of his personality. The videos wouldn't be the same without them.

So...I enjoy them both? And hooray for overwrought analyses!

[tamaness]

You just have to look at my Flickr to know that I'm a cat person.

I don't like dogs for these reasons (some breeds are exceptions, I know):

Dogs are totally dependent, as in they need you to walk them, play with them, cuddle them, and groom them.
Dogs are loud.
Keeping a dog does not fit with my sleep and work habits.

I like cats for these reasons:

Cats are largely independant, Apart from food and the litter box.
Cats are well-suited for living indoors.
Cats are well-suited to the type of schedule I keep.
Cats excercise, entertain, and groom themselves (but usually won't turn down help from their keeper).


My experiences with both types of animal lead me to enjoy having a cat more than having a dog. For the same reasons, You might prefer a dog to a cat.

As far as the podcast goes: sounds good, was entertaining, and I really have nothing else to add.

[Matt]

You just have to look at my Flickr to know that I'm a cat person.

I don't like dogs for these reasons (some breeds are exceptions, I know):

Dogs are totally dependent, as in they need you to walk them, play with them, cuddle them, and groom them.
Dogs are loud.
Keeping a dog does not fit with my sleep and work habits.

I like cats for these reasons:

Cats are largely independant, Apart from food and the litter box.
Cats are well-suited for living indoors.
Cats are well-suited to the type of schedule I keep.
Cats excercise, entertain, and groom themselves (but usually won't turn down help from their keeper).


My experiences with both types of animal lead me to enjoy having a cat more than having a dog. For the same reasons, You might prefer a dog to a cat.

As far as the podcast goes: sounds good, was entertaining, and I really have nothing else to add.

this is a fair assessment of the situation.

-m

[Cybren]

Right, exactly, "good tempered dogs are good tempered" is your point and it's tautological. Cats are good tempered as well, but if you try to treat a two pound cat the same way you do a forty pound dog, you might be in for a surprise. And you admit to manhandling it.

That all may be true. It doesn't make your pervious argument any less invalid.

-m

The purpose of my previous argument was to point out that dogs are capable of being hostile, and that when they are, they are potentially lethal, whereas, barring allergy, most house cats are not.

That you decided to say "well aside from X, Y, Z, dogs are good tempered" was just bonus points.

[Matt]

Right, exactly, "good tempered dogs are good tempered" is your point and it's tautological. Cats are good tempered as well, but if you try to treat a two pound cat the same way you do a forty pound dog, you might be in for a surprise. And you admit to manhandling it.

That all may be true. It doesn't make your pervious argument any less invalid.

-m

The purpose of my previous argument was to point out that dogs are capable of being hostile, and that when they are, they are potentially lethal, whereas, barring allergy, most house cats are not.

That you decided to say "well aside from X, Y, Z, dogs are good tempered" was just bonus points.

The problem I have, is that in so doing you used an argument that held no water. I agree, you are more likely to die owning a dog than a cat. the chance of dying from either is immesurably small. But to say that you are more likey to die from a dog than a timberwolf is akin to saying "You're more likely to die from a car than a giant squid". Well DUH. 20 million people in this country own cars, but you could probably count on your hands the number of people that have seen a live giant squid on your hands.

One can then pretty effectively dismante the remaining portion of your argument by pointing out that the dogs that most frequently kill or injure are not the dogs most frequently kept as pets.

If people commonly tried to keep lynxes and lions as pets you'd probably see a lot more feline related fatalities, too.

-m

[Cybren]

Right, exactly, "good tempered dogs are good tempered" is your point and it's tautological. Cats are good tempered as well, but if you try to treat a two pound cat the same way you do a forty pound dog, you might be in for a surprise. And you admit to manhandling it.

That all may be true. It doesn't make your pervious argument any less invalid.

-m

The purpose of my previous argument was to point out that dogs are capable of being hostile, and that when they are, they are potentially lethal, whereas, barring allergy, most house cats are not.

That you decided to say "well aside from X, Y, Z, dogs are good tempered" was just bonus points.

The problem I have, is that in so doing you used an argument that held no water. I agree, you are more likely to die owning a dog than a cat. the chance of dying from either is immesurably small. But to say that you are more likey to die from a dog than a timberwolf is akin to saying "You're more likely to die from a car than a giant squid". Well DUH. 20 million people in this country own cars, but you could probably count on your hands the number of people that have seen a live giant squid on your hands.

One can then pretty effectively dismante the remaining portion of your argument by pointing out that the dogs that most frequently kill or injure are not the dogs most frequently kept as pets.

If people commonly tried to keep lynxes and lions as pets you'd probably see a lot more feline related fatalities, too.

-m

Except my argument wasn't "dogs will kill you", or "dogs have a chance to kill you". It was "you're pretty silly if you think that dogs are friendly as a rule".

And you're flat out wrong in stating "the dogs that most frequently kill or injure are not most frequently kept as pets".

The German Shepard, for example, is one of the most popular breeds. The Rottweiler was both the dog most commonly associated with attacks on humans and the most popular dog at around the same time period.

EDIT: Source
http://www.akc.org/reg/dogreg_stats.cfm Rotts and German Shepards both in the top for the american kennel clubs registration numbers.
http://www.dogbitelaw.com/dogbreeds.pdf
Rotts and shepards are #2 and #3 for all time fatalities respectively.

[Matt]

Except my argument wasn't "dogs will kill you", or "dogs have a chance to kill you". It was "you're pretty silly if you think that dogs are friendly as a rule".

That may be the point you were trying to make, but it's not what you said.

And you're flat out wrong in stating "the dogs that most frequently kill or injure are not most frequently kept as pets".

The German Shepard, for example, is one of the most popular breeds. The Rottweiler was both the dog most commonly associated with attacks on humans and the most popular dog at around the same time period.

Verifiable stats or it didn't happen. I happen to have this google link that based on data from the American Kennel Association puts labs and retrievers in the top 1 and 2 spots respectively in the USA. Shepards show at #3 (but look below for more on that) and rotweilers are down around #8 with a description of "they're so popular because they make great guard dogs!"

incidentally, the other two in the top five are the oh-so-formidable beagle, and the fearsome dachshund.

I accounted above for german shepards as a matter of trainability. They are highly intelligent, and easily trained. It's why the police use them. They are perfectly suitable housepets when raised as such, and have the temperment for it. They can also be highly effective enforcement/guard/attack animals if raised to be so, and the kind of GS that has been raised to be aggressive and protective you probably don't want kicking around the house with your five year old.

Not all dogs are good housepets. I get that. In fact, I said it before you did.

EDIT: I'm done. I like dogs. I especially like Golden Retrievers. It should be pretty clear by now that when I vehemently like something I tend to hyperbolize it, especially to my friends. Like I did on the podcast, Re: golden retrievers. You want to own a cat? go for it. I'm not going to think less of you. I am a dog person. I do not like cats. I don't even like the cats I DO like. I believe that there is no better pet than a dog, and I believe so because there is no better pet for me than a dog. I LOVE dogs. I wish more people liked dogs. I probably (ok, definitely) am militant and evangelical with my like of dogs. So it's easy for me to get caught up in an argument like this.

I like dogs.

Can we move on now?

-m

[Cybren]

Except my argument wasn't "dogs will kill you", or "dogs have a chance to kill you". It was "you're pretty silly if you think that dogs are friendly as a rule".

That may be the point you were trying to make, but it's not what you said.

It wasn't necessary for me to say it. It was implicit in your responding to me, as you had to admit that the breed of dogs that are good tempered are good tempered. And then discounted two of the most popular breeds saying they're not. And then saying one is but he's trainable but "doesn't count". Which is a load of bullshit and you know it. It has no bearing on the argument you made

And you're flat out wrong in stating "the dogs that most frequently kill or injure are not most frequently kept as pets".

The German Shepard, for example, is one of the most popular breeds. The Rottweiler was both the dog most commonly associated with attacks on humans and the most popular dog at around the same time period.

Verifiable stats or it didn't happen. I happen to have this google link that based on data from the American Kennel Association puts labs and retrievers in the top 1 and 2 spots respectively in the USA. Shepards show at #3 (but look below for more on that) and rotweilers are down around #8 with a description of "they're so popular because they make great guard dogs!"

I added the links before you posted, but you were likely already responding. What other dogs comprise the top 10-20 are irrelevent. You claimed specifically that the dogs that frequently harm people are unpopular, and I pointed out that two of them are, specifically, very popular.

Not all dogs are good housepets. I get that. In fact, I said it before you did.

-m

And yet everything else in this thread, you said they are, and confused your own anecdotal experience for fact (eg, Kathleens cats, your "14 years manhandling of dogs"). Furthermore you

EDIT: I'm done. I like dogs. I especially like Golden Retrievers. It should be pretty clear by now that when I vehemently like something I tend to hyperbolize it, especially to my friends. Like I did on the podcast, Re: golden retrievers. You want to own a cat? go for it. I'm not going to think less of you. I am a dog person. I do not like cats. I don't even like the cats I DO like. I believe that there is no better pet than a dog, and I believe so because there is no better pet for me than a dog. I LOVE dogs. I wish more people liked dogs. I probably (ok, definitely) and militant and evangelical with my like of dogs. So it's easy for me to get caught up in an argument like this.

As you like dogs, I like unimportant arguments and disagreeing with people who get excited about things. Incidentally, in between spats of posting on this thread, I pet my cat and it scratched up my hand. I am not "a cat person", though I do like my cat (that can't be disputed. It took a shit on my bed and I didn't kill it). I have fond memories of my first cat, Smokey. But so to do I of the neighbours two black labs and my aunts collie.

[Graham]

When I was a kid I wanted a hamster.