The Big Relationship Thread

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Avistew
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Avistew » 04 Feb 2012, 01:56

Well, when he left I had just started a game and it didn't feel polite to be the only person to get up and hug him (plus it would have drawn attention too much) but I help out my hand for a fist-bumb, which he gave me, which is still contact, and more than he had with anyone else. So, win?
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Duckay » 04 Feb 2012, 02:13

Fezzul wrote:Chicks dig basses, yes?


It's impossible to make a "yes" emphatic enough.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Fezzul » 04 Feb 2012, 13:11

Shweet
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Aeralis
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Aeralis » 04 Feb 2012, 18:12

So, I, uh... I kinda met someone. Wasn't really expecting to, but I'm really interested to see where this goes. Maybe I'll have a surprise valentine after all. :)
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby SevenFieldsOfAwesome » 06 Feb 2012, 03:14

IGNORE
Last edited by SevenFieldsOfAwesome on 06 Feb 2012, 03:16, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby SevenFieldsOfAwesome » 06 Feb 2012, 03:15

IGNORE
Last edited by SevenFieldsOfAwesome on 06 Feb 2012, 03:15, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby SevenFieldsOfAwesome » 06 Feb 2012, 03:15

I'm in a tad it of trouble. I think, I'm really not all that certain what happened. So, I have this really strange relationship with my ex-girlfriend. She's more than just a friend, like a lot of people still remain friends with ex's (I think?) but we've stayed really close, and I'm not sure that it's healthy. My reasoning behind this is that I'm single and she's with someone, while it doesn't bother me none, and I feel no jealousy or such bitter feelings, I still have quite a lot of feelings for her, and I've told her this, because personally I think she deserves to not be kept in the dark, seeing as she's a dear friend, and she didn't freak out or really respond negatively when I told her, just a hug and "I know." I wasn't exactly surprised to hear she knew, it wasn't exactly a huge secret, I just don't know where this leaves us now that I've clarified her suspicions.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby theDreamer » 06 Feb 2012, 03:34

In case you haven't been following the thread lately: I think most of us are of the opinion that unless you're polyamorous, you don't profess feelings to someone in a relationship. It just puts strain everywhere, and isn't healthy. Just for future.

The damage is done though, and your best bet is to move on and try and meet someone else.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby The Jester » 06 Feb 2012, 03:59

Move on and find someone else, SevenFields.
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Duckay
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Duckay » 06 Feb 2012, 04:00

Did I start something, or is this just something that a lot of people are going through right now?

(I know it's not just me, but seriously, this is a real trend in this thread right now!)
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby WBAGNR » 06 Feb 2012, 05:35

Yeah, it's something a few people are going through, including me...

The girl I'm seeing has another admirer who she knew about before we were together, but he didn't make a move for a variety of reasons, and then I got in there first, and I'm mates with him, so it's a bit awkward, because he really likes her, but she said she doesn't feel the same way towards him.

I said to him the girl in question is lucky to have two guys (me and him) that care for her so much, and he said he doesn't have any grudges, but obviously you can't just get rid of feelings for someone just like that.

Hopefully things will be fine. She (the girl I'm seeing) has just come back from a weekend in Amsterdam with the University, and she said going out there made her realise how much she likes me, which is awesome! :D
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Aeralis
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Aeralis » 06 Feb 2012, 09:28

SevenFields, while it is true that some people can still be friends after a break-up, it's an entirely different beast when you still have feelings for the other person. And from what you said, even ignoring that she's in a new relationship, it really sounds like she doesn't feel the same way as you do. I'd imagine this to put a lot of stress on you, and some awkwardness for her. It's altogether a crappy and unhealthy situation.

I'd recommend putting a little distance between you both. Not completely cut her out, just give a little space for a bit, and see how you feel after that. The space could be exactly the thing you need to get down to a true friendship level.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Avistew » 06 Feb 2012, 17:01

Duckay wrote:Did I start something, or is this just something that a lot of people are going through right now?

(I know it's not just me, but seriously, this is a real trend in this thread right now!)


Well I talked about mine a few months back, but your post prompted me to ask again because of the answers it was getting.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Duckay » 06 Feb 2012, 17:19

Avistew wrote:Well I talked about mine a few months back, but your post prompted me to ask again because of the answers it was getting.


I know; I remember your original post about it. I was just being silly because I found it kinda funny that there's been such a strong trend in the thread lately.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Digital Dolphin » 07 Feb 2012, 14:07

I found myself unexpectedly missing someone over the course of the weekend I spent in Victoria for GottaCon (last weekend). I have a pretty strong connection with this person, and they are important to me, but I've never really pined for their presence. It makes me wonder if I have stronger feelings for them than I thought.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Elomin Sha » 07 Feb 2012, 15:11

You spent all of the con staring at a mirror didn't you Digital? I'm sure loving yourself too much is illegal in some provinces.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Lyinginbedmon » 07 Feb 2012, 15:28

Or medically alarming at least.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Digital Dolphin » 07 Feb 2012, 15:53

Elomin Sha wrote:You spent all of the con staring at a mirror didn't you Digital? I'm sure loving yourself too much is illegal in some provinces.


How did you guess?! :shock:

But seriously, it was just a bit surprising to me. I know I'm pretty important to the girl in question also, but neither of us have time in our lives for a relationship. That's probably an attracting factor for me :P
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby AmzRigh » 08 Feb 2012, 17:19

This maybe belongs somewhere between here and the Mixed Emotions thread, but anyway--

Lately, it seems that anytime I work up the courage to ask a girl on a date, she has just gotten into a relationship. And by "just," I mean a scale of days; half a week at most. Thankfully, I've saved myself some awkwardness by discovering this via Facebook before having actually said anything. This is pretty discouraging, but is not the central focus here.

One such a girl just became single again, and this is where the mixed emotions come in.

On the one hand, a door that had been closed to me might be open again. It's a glimmer of opportunity for me when chances have been escaping me left and right.

On the other hand, they were only together for, like, a month...and she seems really torn up over it. If that short of a thing elicits that strong a reaction, makes me wonder if I wouldn't be getting in way over my head, and if this is an opportunity I wouldn't rather let slip.

Granted, it could just be that it ended really horribly. I mean, I've gotten pretty upset at people I barely know; I can only imagine it would be worse if it were someone close that pulled something, even if they hadn't been close for that long.

Either way, I'm definitely not going to be rushing into this. Maybe I'll try and hang out with her more, non-date-wise, and feel the situation out from there. Couldn't hurt, right?
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Kara » 08 Feb 2012, 23:24

Don't let her being upset over what could be some guy potentially have rejected her or been harsh, or just because she really liked a guy who she hadn't been with for too long. You can get torn up over such things for a variety of reasons, and you shouldn't base a matter of personality or even her ability to deal with feeling bad without it overly negatively affecting her life and relationships with people on this example I think.

Get to know her more, see what opportunities come of it, if you really like her go for it, if a lot of serious red flags come up while getting to know her reconsider your options and what you want to do.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby JustAName » 11 Feb 2012, 02:25

Every time I think I'm okay and I can deal with the distance, it hits me upside the head again. I mean, for fuck's sake, it's only been three weeks. But I feel worse than after five months last time.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Lyinginbedmon » 11 Feb 2012, 11:31

*hugs Fayili*

As an obstacle that cannot be removed save by the difficult task of moving, distance is a perpetual agony on long-distance relationships. My only advice I can really give is to make the most of what you can, be it in person or in text or phone calls.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Fezzul » 11 Feb 2012, 13:34

Never stop communicating and doing whatever fun things you can.

It's as simple and as difficult as that.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Elomin Sha » 11 Feb 2012, 14:12

And when things go bad you always have the choice of burning an effigy of fire.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Geoff_B » 11 Feb 2012, 14:19

Wait wait wait is the effigy made of fire?
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