The Big Relationship Thread

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viscomica
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby viscomica » 09 Oct 2013, 15:25

Good thing you noticed before messaging her! :) I second Bebop's opinion on the subject. Good luck with that KiteNeravar!
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby ZePancakes » 09 Oct 2013, 23:01

Girlfriend is coming down this weekend! WOOO- :D
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Bebop Man » 10 Oct 2013, 10:02

Bow chicka bow wow.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby viscomica » 10 Oct 2013, 15:43

Kudos for upcoming sex
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Lyinginbedmon » 18 Oct 2013, 01:19

So I was feeling down yesterday, lonely and despondent, and for whatever reason I decided Ms Schwarz was the best option in my vast array of contacts to pour my heart out to. She didn't have much to say, and I didn't expect it, but I was happy to confide how I was feeling to her.

Evidently she was happy about it too because she hasn't stopped using love heart emoticons at any opportunity since.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby TheRocket » 18 Oct 2013, 06:53

Last Thursday was our 3 year anniversary and it was FANTASTIC. We almost died a bazillion times, but that is kind of like a running gag with our anniversaries now. We went to Medieval Times (BECAUSE I AM AN ADULT AND CHOOSE THESE PLACES), and had a great night of dinnerish theatreish? The jousting was pretty cool, and any excuse to eat with my hands like a barbarian is always nice.

Also put all the gluten free baked goods in and around my mouth.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Kortanios » 20 Oct 2013, 15:14

Well, still single... Turns out the girl whom I had been flirting with on the committee had turned actual flirting into leading me on.

I just got an invitation to the wedding of one of my closest friends (and housemate) earlier today. As much as I think they make a good couple, they have just been together for about 1 and a half years and when they get married she will only be 22. What worries me is that they are also very religious to the point where they don't sleep in the same room to avoid the temptation of the flesh and thus don't even know whether they can stand sleeping next to one another (or god forbid know whether they are sexually compatible). I know I should be happy for them, but I don't really think they are making the right choice... And this is making me sound like a horrible friend...

On a less depressing note, last night was a massive confidence boost. So we had the launch party for our college ball. While there I started flirting with a friend of someone else on the committee, who was only here for the weekend. The flirting carried on throughout the crew date (a dinner of the committee with excessive drinking and drinking games) and in the club we went to afterwards and the evening ended in a lot of making out. Why do I even mention this? So, the whole summer of flirting via the internet/eventually just being lead on had destroyed my self-confidence. This went as far as when for the last few weeks I had been approached on a couple of occasions by girls who were open to being flirted with, I just got cold feet despite wanting to flirt with them. AND I managed to stay in a club for almost 3 hours, setting a new record for myself and proving that my mind is stronger than my mild claustrophobia in those places.
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Bebop Man
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Bebop Man » 20 Oct 2013, 15:20

1 and a half years seems like not a lot of time to be dating before marrying, 22 years seems too young to get married. Sounds like a shot in the dark.
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viscomica
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby viscomica » 20 Oct 2013, 15:25

Indeed.
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Pikachaos
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Pikachaos » 20 Oct 2013, 16:00

I believe any amount of time can be enough to know, or at least make a good guess, as well as any age [over 20 maybe]. The thing is, people dating for 5 years can be bad for each other, and people married after a week can stay together forever. It's a lot of luck and a lot of hoping what you know about a person is true.


In this case however, it does sound like a TERRIBLE idea, but entirely because of the whole "we can't sleep in the same bed" thing.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Fezzul » 20 Oct 2013, 20:42

Asked a girl out, got turned down. World keeps on spinning.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Narcuru » 20 Oct 2013, 20:44

I had my best friend do that recently. He is super religious and most relationships go from nothing, to engaged for 3-6 months, to married. There is no separate "dating" time involved its just rolled into the engagement period. I'm guessing the reasoning is "God choose for them to be together" (there is a lot of praying before hand), so there's no need to bother with dating.

For an outsider this just seems weird. I've known my friend for 10-12 years and he wasn't the type of person that talks to girls unless he needs to and then in 6 months he goes from that to married which makes it so jarring.

When they were engaged they would watch movies together at the house but I needed to be home (not in the room, just home) to "chaperone" them. They never stayed anywhere together past 11 pm. They never held hands in public (I did notice my friend putting his arm around her a few times during movie watching when I would come down to get something to eat but that was the extent of physical touching), didn't kiss, nothing physical.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby My pseudonym is Ix » 21 Oct 2013, 07:54

Tim Minchin proposed to his wife after they'd been going out for... three months, from memory? They've been together for at least a decade now. Hardly a statistical revolution, but enough to prove that it can happen.

Plus, you gotta realise that the super-religious frequently operate on a completely different plane with regards to... well quite a few things, but relationships are among them. If their religion comes to dominate their outlook, they have different priorities, different criteria, different goals, different standards. Doesn't mean that the aforementioned scenario will "work", only that what you or I define as 'working' might not be their definition.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Bebop Man » 21 Oct 2013, 08:08

It's just so wrong when people marry as a way of "naturally moving on in life", like it's the next logical step after X and before Y. Don't they even want to experience some freedom? And I don't mean that in the player sense. Buy a big massive bed and sleep spread-eagled on it, arrive home whenever the fuck you feel like, see your friends whenever you like, go on a trip alone, do the dishes TOMORROW... above all do whatever you want when you feel like, right? Once you're married that's TWO people you have to answer to.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Lyinginbedmon » 21 Oct 2013, 09:25

I've experienced just about everything you list in the course of my university education.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Duckay » 21 Oct 2013, 13:41

My best friend and his girlfriend appear to be having their first fight. Why does this concern me? Because his phone is broken, so he gave her my number so if she needs to get in touch with him while he's with me, she can. She called me to ask if he was with me because he had plans with her last night and hadn't gotten in touch with her to say otherwise, and I explained that no he wasn't but last I heard he was on his way home so he should be there. Later she messaged me again to vent that he had posted on his Mum's Facebook wall to tell her he wasn't going to be coming home that night, and still hadn't gotten onto her to tell her what was going on. I, without thinking, said that judging from that message he was out drinking. Big mistake - she's very much not happy, and I've pretty well put myself right in the middle.

Fuck my big mouth.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby KiteNeravar » 21 Oct 2013, 15:01

His fault for putting you in the middle of it, if he wanted you to lie for him (or withhold information) then he should have let you know ahead of time.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Duckay » 21 Oct 2013, 15:08

Knowing him, he forgot that he already had plans so decided to go out for a drink with friends when asked. He didn't tell me that he had plans with his girlfriend, but he also didn't tell me he was going out for a drink (I just saw the message he'd posted on his Mum's Facebook and recognized his drunkenness). I suppose I shouldn't have said anything because it's not my place, but as I said, it just popped out of my mouth without thinking.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby The Jester » 21 Oct 2013, 15:19

I have a growing crush on a girl some eight years my junior. Not sure how to feel about this. :?

[ETA]: Bonus points for her being in California, a full eight hours behind where I live.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Bebop Man » 21 Oct 2013, 15:27

Ugh, "where the hell were you" fights.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby viscomica » 21 Oct 2013, 15:34

My two cents are.... people should not forget about dates, period. Also as a person who generally speaking, never knows when to shut up, I feel for you Duckay!
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby Bebop Man » 21 Oct 2013, 15:38

The Jester wrote:I have a growing crush on a girl some eight years my junior. Not sure how to feel about this. :?

[ETA]: Bonus points for her being in California, a full eight hours behind where I live.


Age difference isn't necessarily an impediment but it also matters how old is EACH person. Because being 32 and dating someone who's 40 isn't much of a difference, but being 16 and dating someone who's 24 is.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby viscomica » 21 Oct 2013, 15:40

Bebop Man wrote:
The Jester wrote:I have a growing crush on a girl some eight years my junior. Not sure how to feel about this. :?

[ETA]: Bonus points for her being in California, a full eight hours behind where I live.


Age difference isn't necessarily an impediment but it also matters how old is EACH person. Because being 32 and dating someone who's 40 isn't much of a difference, but being 16 and dating someone who's 24 is.


Agreed.
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby The Jester » 21 Oct 2013, 15:43

I'm 26. The reason the crush is only small is because I know I don't know her very well, and we still haven't hung out on Skype or anything (like, in real time I mean) so I know I can't form a real opinion of how much I'm attracted to her.

Actually, I'm quite proud of myself for managing not to form an idea in which I get overly invested and instead waiting to get to know her better before knowing whether I'll fall for her or not. Which may not sound like much but trust me; it's a real step forward beyond the vast majority of my previous crushes. :P
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viscomica
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Re: The Big Relationship Thread

Postby viscomica » 21 Oct 2013, 15:45

Hmm.... so... she's 18?

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