Question for the dating oriented

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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby JustAName » 17 Sep 2010, 14:38

When she mentioned that you were only friends, you could have said something to the effect of, "Well, we don't have to be." I dunno now, though. This could either mean she's trying to get you to refute that you're only friends, or it could mean that she's on to you and is trying to put ideas of romance out of your head before things get awkward. Can't tell which, though.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby gcninja » 17 Sep 2010, 14:40

o_O she probably woulda chucked the lizard she was holding at me or ran off <_< not to mention im not like... sorry

I was already wrong once on a 50/50 thing today, don't wanna risk it again

Also, that did cross my mind, or that she was just saying that to her father to calm him, he's apparently the untrusting type as he wouldn't even allow her to borrow my ps2 to play KH on it cuz he doesn't know me.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby JustAName » 17 Sep 2010, 14:58

Sure, but she didn't have to tell you about it. The fact that she did means something.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby Gordon Fearman » 17 Sep 2010, 15:02

Yes. That it's a story that involves him. I don't know, I complain about my parents being thick all the time. To my friends. So yeah.

But also girls are insane, so I don't know, man. I will say that the "We don't have to be" comment would've sounded really weird/creepy to me.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby JustAName » 17 Sep 2010, 15:07

Yeah, I'm... not gonna say anything for fear of being kicked out of the International Women's Organization for Users of Obscure Hints. The Subtlety Club already chucked me out a long time ago.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby The Jester » 17 Sep 2010, 15:47

I KNEW IT! I knew there was one o'them such things. -.-
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby gcninja » 17 Sep 2010, 15:57

Now she must kill all males on the forums. Even graham...
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby JustAName » 17 Sep 2010, 15:58

Oh please. You think I'd tell you about the actual organizations? This was just a clever ploy to throw you off. Wait...
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby iamafish » 17 Sep 2010, 17:00

Well either she wants to be more than just friends - hence mentioning the possibility of you being together along with the fact that you're not. Or she could mean nothing by what she said and was just telling an interesting story about you. Or she was trying to stop you from thinking about her romantically.

The first one means that you should ask her out

The second means that you could ask her out and it would probably be quite a surprise, but by the sounds of it she'd say 'yes' anyway

The third means you shouldn't

So I'd say ask her our, because from what she's said there's a decent possibility that she wants to go out with you too (or at leasts hasn't really considered it). If she says no and was trying to dissuade you by what she said, then obviously you should apologise and maybe say that it wasn't all that obvious. make some joke about men not being about to work out subtlety. hopefully she will still be ok with you being friends, even if it is a little weird for a while.

As for the father. I'd suggest that both of you be pretty honest with him. Try to meet him early on in the relationship. I mean you're both adults, so he has no real right to stop you two from seeing each other. That being said it's worth staying onside. You will probably have to take things pretty slow with him in the picture, but that that's not a really much of a problem.

tl;dr ask her out, it wont be the end of the world if she says 'no'.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby gcninja » 17 Sep 2010, 17:14

I've actually met him, he knows me by looks alone but I didn't know it was him. I met him about half a year ago. I work in a town that is about...
well here look
Too late you missed it!

So he knows me, just gotta get that trust
Last edited by gcninja on 17 Sep 2010, 18:01, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby Metcarfre » 17 Sep 2010, 17:16

STALK MODE ENGAGED
*
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby gcninja » 17 Sep 2010, 17:55

well you get the gist, that unlabled one is the general place of her, its like 4 minutes from here.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby gcninja » 17 Sep 2010, 19:07

Also, one thing I was wondering to try. Im going to a con in about two weeks, should I test the waters and say something like "maybe Ill find a chick to hook up with. Ah, anime girls, the best there is." and see if she gets mad, angry, or sad?
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby thatlaurachick » 17 Sep 2010, 19:10

gcninja wrote:Also, one thing I was wondering to try. Im going to a con in about two weeks, should I test the waters and say something like "maybe Ill find a chick to hook up with. Ah, anime girls, the best there is." and see if she gets mad, angry, or sad?


If she gets mad... you just blew it. This is a horrible idea.
Last edited by thatlaurachick on 17 Sep 2010, 19:51, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby gcninja » 17 Sep 2010, 19:37

lmao aight then
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby AlexanderDitto » 17 Sep 2010, 19:40

gcninja wrote:Also, one thing I was wondering to try. Im going to a con in about two weeks, should I test the waters and say something like "maybe Ill find a chick to hook up with. Ah, anime girls, the best there is." and see if she gets mad, angry, or sad?


This is maybe one of the worst ideas I have ever heard. Not only would it guarantee a bad outcome for you (as laura mentioned, if she gets mad, you blew it because she thinks you're a jerk; if she doesn't care, she doesn't like you; if she gets sad, she thinks you have no interest in her), but it's kind of demeaning and just a stupid thing to say.

Why don't you just ask her if she wants to come with you to the con?


(I will forgive you because of your avatar. HAWP is hilarious.)
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby Telaril » 17 Sep 2010, 21:54

Ugh I have a horrible confession to make here, one that will undermine my standing as "the girl who always tells guys she likes them."

I've said "Oh, we're just friends" to parents/friends/coworkers in regards to guys I was interested in ALL THE TIME. Usually it's because *I* don't want to seem presumptuous. Girls asking guys out fucks up the social order and some guys react badly. Saying "we're just friends" is me saying "I haven't interpreted any of your non-romantic friendliness as an advance yet."

And any kind of cryptic statement about anime girls being awesome... insufficient hint, probably has negative consequences.

A few months ago I was talking relationships with a bunch of my WoW-related guy friends. I was joking that I'm an annoying girlfriend because I'm always trying to force boys to cosplay, and one of the guys responded with this:
"That actually sounds fun. I'd prefer that to a girl who doesn't let me play WoW because it's 'too nerdy.'"

I took that as an obvious flirtation and asked him out a couple of months later. Sadly, it wasn't a flirtation at all. Vague statements suck and most girls are significantly less aggressive in chasing them than I am.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby JustAName » 17 Sep 2010, 21:59

Mmhmm. Plus there's the fact that parents are SUPER ANNOYING if they know you like someone. Like, seriously. Guh.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby Telaril » 17 Sep 2010, 22:03

Fayili wrote:Mmhmm. Plus there's the fact that parents are SUPER ANNOYING if they know you like someone. Like, seriously. Guh.


Oh GOD yes.

My parents have even been super annoying about guys who have been established, DECADES LONG platonic friends. As long as a person in your life is straight, the opposite gender, and single your parents may choose to harp on them.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby falconknight06 » 17 Sep 2010, 22:55

I'm way past the point of my parents (or even grandparents) interfering in relationships. I knew it was bad when my super old school conservative grandmother told me outright that it was OK if I had girls stay the night at my house. My parents and I both were pretty sure my grandmother gave her blessing for me to have sex, which was really weird to me and my mom. I think she is worried I'm gay as I've never had a girlfriend and only been out on one date and I'm 23 years old.

Sorry for the aside, I just felt like sharing
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby Murakami » 17 Sep 2010, 23:32

falconknight06 wrote:I think she is worried I'm gay as I've never had a girlfriend and only been out on one date and I'm 23 years old.


Well, uhh, are ya a poofer?

Kidding, kidding!

I think imafish put it the right way. You can't draw a conclusion from just that comment. You can't really know what people think until you ask them and they tell you.
Last edited by Murakami on 17 Sep 2010, 23:33, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby JustAName » 17 Sep 2010, 23:32

Telaril wrote:
Fayili wrote:Mmhmm. Plus there's the fact that parents are SUPER ANNOYING if they know you like someone. Like, seriously. Guh.


Oh GOD yes.

My parents have even been super annoying about guys who have been established, DECADES LONG platonic friends. As long as a person in your life is straight, the opposite gender, and single your parents may choose to harp on them.


This. There was a guy I adopted as my big brother, and my mom wouldn't stop about how great he was, eh, eh?
Alja-Markir wrote:Andy is the LRR Heart-throb.
Morgan is the LRR Crotch-throb.


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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby gcninja » 18 Sep 2010, 01:50

AlexanderDitto wrote:
gcninja wrote:Also, one thing I was wondering to try. Im going to a con in about two weeks, should I test the waters and say something like "maybe Ill find a chick to hook up with. Ah, anime girls, the best there is." and see if she gets mad, angry, or sad?


This is maybe one of the worst ideas I have ever heard. Not only would it guarantee a bad outcome for you (as laura mentioned, if she gets mad, you blew it because she thinks you're a jerk; if she doesn't care, she doesn't like you; if she gets sad, she thinks you have no interest in her), but it's kind of demeaning and just a stupid thing to say.

Why don't you just ask her if she wants to come with you to the con?


(I will forgive you because of your avatar. HAWP is hilarious.)

I did offer, the thing is she'll have to pay her own way, and a room is ~280 and ticket 40. IDK if shed be up for dropping that coin
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby Arius » 18 Sep 2010, 02:20

This thread needs some courage...



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And just in case:



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---

But seriously, ignore all the people telling you to beat around the bush. Dive headfirst into that bush and ask her out. The worst that can happen is she says no.* Then you just find a new bush.

DOUBLE ENTENDRE!

* The actual worst that could happen is she's a psychotic killer and kills you and your entire family after torturing you for years.
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Re: Question for the dating oriented

Postby Master Gunner » 18 Sep 2010, 08:25

Telaril wrote:
Fayili wrote:Mmhmm. Plus there's the fact that parents are SUPER ANNOYING if they know you like someone. Like, seriously. Guh.


Oh GOD yes.

My parents have even been super annoying about guys who have been established, DECADES LONG platonic friends. As long as a person in your life is straight, the opposite gender, and single your parents may choose to harp on them.


Parents are annoying when they learn any tidbit of your life. Hence my longstanding policy of not telling them anything beyond "life's good, how's yours?".

Secrecy, it's what's for dinner. Evidently has being all my life in my house. But that rant of mine has being done to death.
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