Spanish woman claims Sun, charges for its use

[EnglishMQ]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20101126/od ... 1126190854

To summarise, since the U.N Space charter only says countries can't claim ownership of stars or planets, a Spanish woman, Ms Angeles Duran, has reasoned one single person can do it just fine with no legal complications stopping her.

She now claims to own the sun.

She has registered her claim at the local notary, and will now be charging people for "use of the Sun". But she will be giving part of the money earned from the charges to charity, so that makes all the problems better.

My first thought: What you gonna do when I refuse? This law is completly unenforecable.

My second thought, I CALL PLUTO! Now all Heil the recently Self Appointed Supreme Kaiser for all Eternities! EnglisMQ! Master of Pluto!

First policy, it's a planet again!

Edit: Link fixed.

[Darkobra]

Your link's broken. Oh and dibs on Uranus. Hehehehe...

[Zombaholic]

You would be the BUTT of every joke!

[GreigKM]

She's an asshole. They exist, best to ignore them.

[empath]

I claim Saturn and all its satellites.


But seriously, doesn't 90% of the energy the sun kicks out never hit ANYTHING in the solar system and just fly off into the galactic void? What's she gonna do about all that product she's wasting?! I am gonna file suit against her for "incompetent management of a public utility or similarly essential service".


Furthermore, I cannot AVOID using the product her stellar object is emitting; I formally request she block any radiated energy her Sun is casting on me personally, since I have no intention in 'using her service', and it's her responsibility to protect me from UV radiation side-effects from her service - good news everyone, we never have to worry about sunscreen ever again!

Everyone who ever got a skin cancer band together and start a class-action suit against her mismanagement that's caused years and years of illness for many, many people (and probably not a few deaths).

Legally, she hasn't got a leg to stand on for providing a service ENTIRELY UNASKED FOR AND UNSOLICITED and then retroactively requesting compensation...


Oh, and HERE: http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20101126/od_afp/spainsunoffbeat_20101126190854

EnglishMQ; LEARN TO url-link!!!

Other sources:
New York Post
The Province (not sure which one; I know it's not Nfld ;P )
Vancouver Sun
Herald Sun

...say, what's gonna happen to all these newspapers with 'sun' in their name; are they gonna have to pay her royalties or licensing fees for using the name of her owned object that they're clearly referring to in their titles?

[Bob The Magic Camel]

I have some bad news for her. Though I guess that doesn't stop the water companies from issuing bills either.

[Lorennar]

I call dibs on the Andromeda Galaxy. One-trillion stars for the win! My apologies about the collision of the Milky Way and Andromeda in a few billion years but it totally had the right of way. enjoy. ~t

[Seraphroy]

Dibs on Mars. Anyone wants to explore it, they need to run it by me first. I won't have any riffraff walking over my planet's surface.

[Dubious_wolf]

Uhhhh. what. This smacks of satire. Kinda like Jonathan Swift's Irish baby scheme... This woman just wants her 15 minutes.

[Danja]

I for one welcome our new Solar Overlord and offer my services as a hired thug to go around breaking any artificial lights people might try to use as an alternative to her great product.

[Dubious_wolf]

You're fired.
(also how would you go about pronouncing your name? Is it danger? As is Danja! Danja! Will Robinson!)

[It's My Delorean]

I call Jupiter and all it's moons.Granted, when aliens turn it into it's own sun and all it's moons into planets, I may have a problem o my hands, but that's not gonna happen for another... oh, wait.

[Smeghead]

Are you allowed to claim ownership of Nebulas?

Also, the Sun is a Star, so no matter what the "local" name of the celestial body is; it is still a star.

In related news (sadly I don't have a link for this one).

A russian man has sent an appeal to court over the ownership of the Kremlin, seeing as one of his ancestors was the one who "built" (as in; ordered the workers to do it and work to death while he watched and took bets on who would die next. the usual way people in the past "built" stuff).

[Vanguard]

Alright, lady. I'll play this game. First thing tomorrow I'll send out an official press release that I've claimed ownership of the Earth's Core.

Have fun paying me for all of that gravity you've been enjoying soo damn much, people.

[Vigafre]

I read about this yesterday and I still have the same response.

Meh.

I mean honestly, it's not like she has the money to enforce anything. Anything major, that is. At most, I see this disappearing soon.

[the_lone_bard]

I hereby proclaim myself owner of the void nothingness, your all welcome to your planets and stars, i will henceforth be charging a 1c per mile charge for traveling via my privately owned void to get to them.

[Jillers]

Uhhhh. what. This smacks of satire. Kinda like Jonathan Swift's Irish baby scheme... This woman just wants her 15 minutes.

Satire...I don't think it means what you think it means

[DmitriW]

I claim ownership of the force locally known as "gravity." A $1 (USD) fee will be charged per person per day. Unless you want your little blue-green marble to shoot off into space after dumping you and your atmosphere behind, of course. Then feel free not to pay me.

[Agloriouscuppa]

If she even did try to enforce it, people could simply sue when they got sun burnt or on days it were cloudy.

[Danja]

You're fired.
(also how would you go about pronouncing your name? Is it danger? As is Danja! Danja! Will Robinson!)

Exactly that, yes. Except for the whole Lost In Space bit.

[Jillers]

Oh, and surely you must all know that I own time. I charge a reasonable and negotiable rate, which will be billed to you on your birthday.

[Delusibeta]

I claim ownership of the force locally known as "gravity." A $1 (USD) fee will be charged per person per day. Unless you want your little blue-green marble to shoot off into space after dumping you and your atmosphere behind, of course. Then feel free not to pay me.

But then our remains would fly off and be directed by other planets' gravity? How would that work?

[Vigafre]

Magnets.

I claim magnetism, by the way.

[DmitriW]

Magnets.

I claim magnetism, by the way.

Thanks for the backup. I'll waive your gravity-fee.

[Mad Madam Mimm]

I claim the mixture of elements commonly known as "air".

That'll be 50p each time you inhale, please.