The depressing depression thread
- Jamfalcon
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Re: The depressing depression thread
Edit: I wrote this up before seeing your second post.
While I obviously don't know how things work in Australia, here it's possible to get an adult diploma, which is much simpler than a regular one. After you've turned 19 you only need five courses (English, Math, and three electives) rather than the normal twenty-four you'd need with a normal diploma. It might be worth looking into if you haven't already.
Another idea to consider is looking into finishing your schooling online. Again, I don't know what the system is like over there, but I've taken courses online quite a bit in the past. As long as you're motivated enough to do the work without a teacher you what to do every step of the way, it means not having to work around a set schedule and that you wouldn't need to actually attend a school and feel out of place.
As for university, I haven't gone myself, but like Avistew said, it's not such a big deal to be a few years older than most of the other people there. Lots of people (In Canada at least) take a few years off between high school and college/university to work or travel, and a lot of people go back much later in their lives when they want to switch careers
While I obviously don't know how things work in Australia, here it's possible to get an adult diploma, which is much simpler than a regular one. After you've turned 19 you only need five courses (English, Math, and three electives) rather than the normal twenty-four you'd need with a normal diploma. It might be worth looking into if you haven't already.
Another idea to consider is looking into finishing your schooling online. Again, I don't know what the system is like over there, but I've taken courses online quite a bit in the past. As long as you're motivated enough to do the work without a teacher you what to do every step of the way, it means not having to work around a set schedule and that you wouldn't need to actually attend a school and feel out of place.
As for university, I haven't gone myself, but like Avistew said, it's not such a big deal to be a few years older than most of the other people there. Lots of people (In Canada at least) take a few years off between high school and college/university to work or travel, and a lot of people go back much later in their lives when they want to switch careers
Re: The depressing depression thread
the_lone_bard wrote:It's not so much being the old guy, it's just knowing that I should have started it 2 years ago.
I've wasted so much time in my life, and to make it worse, there is no way to get back on track, i still need to spend just as much time doing things to get to the same position, only now it's later, i'm closer to death and all because i wasted so much time in my life, i didn't just drop out of year 7, i did nothing for almost 7 years afterward. I spent ages 13-19 barely existing. I missed out on highschool, and if I hadn't, I'd have been in my second, going on third year of uni already...
Believe me, I totally understand. As I said, I'm 27. But I can't drive, while most people my age got their license a while ago. I don't have a university diploma because I dropped out of university during my second year, and then left the country, got married, and did nothing (and I mean, nothing. I couldn't even work) for several years.
There are times I feel like a giant failure who will never accomplish anything. So I can definitely relate. But reading about someone else going through it, I keep thinking... It's not too late!
Sure, you'll never get these years back. That's absolutely true. But you can make sure not to waste more of them. Think about you two years from now, do you want to lament that you're 22 and have accomplished nothing, or be able to be proud of getting back on track, even if you haven't caught up?
Once people finish university, it doesn't really matter if they got their diploma two or ten years ago. I've had friend who got a Masters and then didn't find a job for several years. I guess that's not very reassuring, but my point was that it is possible to catch up, because the diplomas end at some point. At some point, people are done, they got their diploma. If you get yours later, they won't have another one. As for experience, everyone gets experience in different things and in different ways.
I know that when you're depressed, it's hard to get motivated and do things. I don't know your situation, if you're taking meds to help or seeing a therapist you can talk to or that kind of thing. No advice on a forum can substitute for proper treatment or care. But think of it as a new start. It's possible. People change careers and have to start over, and they're older than you. If you start now you won't finish university at 20 or 22 or whatever, but if you don't start you won't finish it at all. If it's important to you, you can do it.
It's easy to feel worthless when there is nothing concrete you can rely on as a measure of success. But you're not worthless. You made decisions that you regret, and if you can learn from these mistakes and make decisions to set you back on track, what you'll learn from the experience will be something they can't teach in university. Sometimes you need to learn by doing the wrong thing so that later you can do the right thing.
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- the_lone_bard
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Re: The depressing depression thread
I guess another thing I failed to mention that's brought this about is, it will take me YEARS not months to get a year 12 pass (Requirement to study psychology at uni.) Meanwhile, I'm going to have to delay that god knows how long, because of my living situation I finally bit the bullet and said screw it, leg problems or no, i'm getting a job, and now I have friends pulling strings to get my a job at Hungry Jacks (Burger King for you US types.).
Which means I won't have 8 hours a day to devote to traveling to the city to go to school to get myself closer to a year 12 pass.
And that's just to survive. While I know that somepoint down the line I can probably work something out to start making progress again, it's an undetermined time.
I'm 20 now. And I missed out on my childhood, I missed out on my teen years, and now it seems i'm going to miss out on my early 20s. While I will hopefully get some cash and be able to go hang out with friends more now, ina few years they will be done with uni about the time I'm entering it, they will be ditching their shitty fast food jobs in their mid 20's and getting good jobs, with good pay. Able to support their families and whatnot, whereas I will be at least 6 years behind them, if not more.
When they hit 30, most will have degrees and decent jobs, be with someone they love and whatnot. When I hit 30 I'll be lucky to be finishing off uni and still working in fast food. While I'm hopefully not going to miss out on my 20's like I have everything upto this point, there will come another point where the universe evens itself out and I wind up missing out again.
And it just wouldn't hurt nearly as much if I knew I had SOMETHING going for me, love, money, school, home life, skill at something i love, just something. Yet as it stands I barely have any friends (I don't really mind except most are located hours away.) and I'm alone, in a place I hate, looking out for the only person I care about here (She's a close friend.) with nobody looking out for me.
And it's not too late to start getting my shit together, but as I said, that process is going to require spending even more years in a fast food job, just trying to survive and find time/money to get my schooling back on track. While I watch everyone that I know and care about rocket past me, dooming me to be that guy they know who is still putting his life together around the time they're starting solid careers or families.
And you know what I wish, I wish I could get some sort of chance, but I don't, I'm an athiest, I don't believe there's anything waiting for me, I have one single life, and I've wasted at least half of mine, even if I were to get shit together tommorow, i'd still have wasted the first 1/3rd of it.
I mean, what do I have to show for myself so far in life? Some wargaming models, a half decent computer, four pillows, a blanket, three T-Shirts, 11 pairs of boxers, 5 pairs of tracksuit pants (Slacks?) a pair of good pants, some socks, A broken ipod with a battery life of 4 hours (Stupid bath.) and a bottle of listerine.
20 years, and that's my effect on the world.
My entire existance so far is worthless, my existance for the immediate future is just as worthless, I honestly wonder why I even bother getting out of bed anymore, I know if I don't nothing's going to change, ever, but even if I do, it's so long. It's not a matter of months, or a year, it's years, many many years.
Which means I won't have 8 hours a day to devote to traveling to the city to go to school to get myself closer to a year 12 pass.
And that's just to survive. While I know that somepoint down the line I can probably work something out to start making progress again, it's an undetermined time.
I'm 20 now. And I missed out on my childhood, I missed out on my teen years, and now it seems i'm going to miss out on my early 20s. While I will hopefully get some cash and be able to go hang out with friends more now, ina few years they will be done with uni about the time I'm entering it, they will be ditching their shitty fast food jobs in their mid 20's and getting good jobs, with good pay. Able to support their families and whatnot, whereas I will be at least 6 years behind them, if not more.
When they hit 30, most will have degrees and decent jobs, be with someone they love and whatnot. When I hit 30 I'll be lucky to be finishing off uni and still working in fast food. While I'm hopefully not going to miss out on my 20's like I have everything upto this point, there will come another point where the universe evens itself out and I wind up missing out again.
And it just wouldn't hurt nearly as much if I knew I had SOMETHING going for me, love, money, school, home life, skill at something i love, just something. Yet as it stands I barely have any friends (I don't really mind except most are located hours away.) and I'm alone, in a place I hate, looking out for the only person I care about here (She's a close friend.) with nobody looking out for me.
And it's not too late to start getting my shit together, but as I said, that process is going to require spending even more years in a fast food job, just trying to survive and find time/money to get my schooling back on track. While I watch everyone that I know and care about rocket past me, dooming me to be that guy they know who is still putting his life together around the time they're starting solid careers or families.
And you know what I wish, I wish I could get some sort of chance, but I don't, I'm an athiest, I don't believe there's anything waiting for me, I have one single life, and I've wasted at least half of mine, even if I were to get shit together tommorow, i'd still have wasted the first 1/3rd of it.
I mean, what do I have to show for myself so far in life? Some wargaming models, a half decent computer, four pillows, a blanket, three T-Shirts, 11 pairs of boxers, 5 pairs of tracksuit pants (Slacks?) a pair of good pants, some socks, A broken ipod with a battery life of 4 hours (Stupid bath.) and a bottle of listerine.
20 years, and that's my effect on the world.
My entire existance so far is worthless, my existance for the immediate future is just as worthless, I honestly wonder why I even bother getting out of bed anymore, I know if I don't nothing's going to change, ever, but even if I do, it's so long. It's not a matter of months, or a year, it's years, many many years.
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Re: The depressing depression thread
I'm a 21 year old over weight, balding, "college" student who still lives at home. I work a minimal wage job, don't pay any rent and do nothing but cause hassle to my father, so he tells me. I don't know if I'll ever get out of this rut. More so than that, I'm terrible at any hope of a love life, the girl I thought was awesome thinks nothing of me is leaving and I may never see her again. My mother has about 3-5 years left to live, my father will probably go soon after. My brothers already have their lives in order and compared to me I'm going to end up like my uncle, living at home til I die. However with my parents kicking the bucket so soon, I'll just be a lifer working in a grocery store and end up the creepy fifty old guy who hits on the foreign chicks that come here to work until I end up dying in my sleep here or taking a long walk off a short edge. If nothing else, I'll end up in the next book they print out if I do. :\ yaaay for me
EJ wrote:Lyinginbedmon, I'm looking forward to when Paul or Graham reset your & Elomin's post count back to zero. If you keep it up it's bound to happen =p
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Re: The depressing depression thread
My grandfather passed away this Sunday and I came back yesterday night from a three day funeral. He lived a full life so even though it was sad I wasn't completely devastated. I am somewhat over it but the whole point of me posting this is.............hugs?
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Re: The depressing depression thread
Of course hugs! Many hugs! As for the above posters, I'm pretty sure I have you on various forms of communication - send me a message if you can't find me and you'd like me to talk. And let me know if you feel that you're not motivating yourself as well as you could be, and I'll see if I can help push you when you need it. I'd like to be here for you, if you'll let me.
- Geoff_B
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Re: The depressing depression thread
beramode0 wrote:My grandfather passed away this Sunday and I came back yesterday night from a three day funeral. He lived a full life so even though it was sad I wasn't completely devastated. I am somewhat over it but the whole point of me posting this is.............hugs?
My grandad died end of last year so I know exactly what you're going through. So yes of course all the hugs.
Actually now I come to think of it it's almost 12 months... any of those hugs going spare?
Re: The depressing depression thread
*hugs* I'm not completely depressed since I knew his time has come before he passed away so it wasn't completely out of the blue but it sometimes is good to feel loved in these type of situations. Also I'm pretty sure I have Keab on twitter but I don't know about everyone else.
- MotorWaffle
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Re: The depressing depression thread
"You need to be happy to live. I don't."
-Keanu Reeves.
Probably the most depressing thing I have heard in awhile.
-Keanu Reeves.
Probably the most depressing thing I have heard in awhile.
le blog: http://geekasaurusmike.blogspot.com/
- Lord Chrusher
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Re: The depressing depression thread
Hugs!
We are all made of star dust. However we are also made of nuclear waste.
Remember to think before you post.
- The Mimm
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Re: The depressing depression thread
I think I need my dosage upped.
What little independence, what little sense of self I had, has basically been taken away. And I can't shake the feeling that maybe that was it. I can't stand anything I create these days. If i'm left alone for, like, 5 minutes, I start wanting to break shit and throw myself around.
There's a shadow that lives in my head, who's lived there for a long time, who I never knew about until recently, because he's gotten louder, gotten more brazen.It's very hard to make him shut up now.
So yeah. I can sympathise. When you're in a shit mood, you don't always have a reason.
What little independence, what little sense of self I had, has basically been taken away. And I can't shake the feeling that maybe that was it. I can't stand anything I create these days. If i'm left alone for, like, 5 minutes, I start wanting to break shit and throw myself around.
There's a shadow that lives in my head, who's lived there for a long time, who I never knew about until recently, because he's gotten louder, gotten more brazen.It's very hard to make him shut up now.
So yeah. I can sympathise. When you're in a shit mood, you don't always have a reason.
Life's like a movie, write your own ending,
Keep believing, keep pretending
Keep believing, keep pretending
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Re: The depressing depression thread
That'd make a good monologue short story Mimm.
The most unique, nicest, and confusing individual you will get to know. Don't be stupid around me, that's my job.
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Re: The depressing depression thread
Awesome lady friend suddenly stopped talking to me a few days ago. Turns out she's gay now? I... don't even.
Can't sleep now. Luckily, I'm out of work tomorrow, but I reaaaaaally don't want to be inside my head anymore.
Can't sleep now. Luckily, I'm out of work tomorrow, but I reaaaaaally don't want to be inside my head anymore.
Re: The depressing depression thread
Wuv you all
- MotorWaffle
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Re: The depressing depression thread
Very minor piece of depression, but Doug Walker has killed off the Nostalgia Critic character permanently, as of now. As one of the handful of internet series' that I enjoy outside LRR, this saddens me.
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Re: The depressing depression thread
I've heard of that. I haven't seen 'To Boldly Flee' yet but it kinda saddens me to. I haven't seen his work lately but I used follow his work a lot and respect the man. We can only hope that he will bring him back, and soon.
- MotorWaffle
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Re: The depressing depression thread
beramode0 wrote:I've heard of that. I haven't seen 'To Boldly Flee' yet but it kinda saddens me to. I haven't seen his work lately but I used follow his work a lot and respect the man. We can only hope that he will bring him back, and soon.
Er...should've put a spoiler alert. Heh...heh...
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Re: The depressing depression thread
MotorWaffle wrote:beramode0 wrote:I've heard of that. I haven't seen 'To Boldly Flee' yet but it kinda saddens me to. I haven't seen his work lately but I used follow his work a lot and respect the man. We can only hope that he will bring him back, and soon.
Er...should've put a spoiler alert. Heh...heh...
Nawwwww. Like I said, I've already heard of the news.
Re: The depressing depression thread
MotorWaffle wrote:Very minor piece of depression, but Doug Walker has killed off the Nostalgia Critic character permanently, as of now. As one of the handful of internet series' that I enjoy outside LRR, this saddens me.
Fuck! Tuesdays was Nc day!
Also, last night hanging with friends and old coworkers for a friends birthday, drinking etc. and THAT is when they tell me an old (age wise) cook I worked with died two days ago :\
He was going to transfer to Death Valley, get outta here to a lower elevation and then BAM dead. They were kinda like "meh" but I've known him since I was 14 when I started working at the cafeteria. ONE THIRD of my life.. Also, WHY tell me when I'm drunk?! Goddamit.
EJ wrote:Lyinginbedmon, I'm looking forward to when Paul or Graham reset your & Elomin's post count back to zero. If you keep it up it's bound to happen =p
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- An Evil Herbivore
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Re: The depressing depression thread
So I guess this kinda veers into shameless self plug territory, but I started a blog where I ramble about depression today.
http://depressivemusings.tumblr.com/
I'm planning on keeping it going to spread awareness and help me through my own depression.
http://depressivemusings.tumblr.com/
I'm planning on keeping it going to spread awareness and help me through my own depression.
I have changed my name like 3 times on this forum. Guess who I am!
- King Kool
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Re: The depressing depression thread
Well, Doug Walker's still going to create content. It just won't be the Nostalgia Critic. He'll still do Bum Reviews and other stuff, and he's got something new in the pipes.
- JackSlack
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Re: The depressing depression thread
I hate losing. Even just to a computer. It makes me feel so worthless.
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