Collaborative Sexy Romance Assassin Teacher Novel...Thingy

[Hepheastus]

(Annnnnnd were back on topic again )

[Laurnil]

She quickly got up in a defensive position. With no weapons, she would have to take care of this with her hands; she had done it many times before. But, before she could do anything, Evan spun around and shot the dark figure in the head. As the figure slumped lifelessly to the ground, Evan said, "Now, we're finally alone. Let's have a chat."

[Timelady]

"Have you ever noticed how our names kinda go really well with each other?" Evan said brightly as he perched on a chair. "Like, the sound of them. And they both start with Ev. And end with n. --Hah, end and n, that almost made a rhyme. But we could be, like, the Evs. Or the Ev twins. Have you ever daydreamed about what you'd name a band if you were in it?"

[Jamfalcon]

Evelyn was starting to think that it wasn't just her who was crazy.

[Laurnil]

"Why I am I here, Evan Pierce?"

"Why are you here? Well, I suggested to the guild that you could be better than any of their top assassins. If you hadn't realized by now, I used to be a member. Then, I disagreed with them and they sent you to kill me. Now, I'm trying to recruit you to my association of assassins, not only as a member, but as my partner, both financially and emotionally."

[Timelady]

"And we could call ourselves the Ev Twins!" Evan finished, beaming.

[Laurnil]

"If we were emotionally involved, wouldn't twins make it sound a little incest-y?"

Evelyn couldn't believe she was actually thinking about this. The only relationship she had with him was a student/teacher relationship. But, she could play with this mouse for a bit and decide later. There was no deadline on the hit. If she decided otherwise, she could kill him and go back to the guild.

[Duckay]

She allowed Evan to take her by the hand and lead her from the room. His tone of voice was chipper and conversational, but she thought she detected something else in his body language. His shoulders were a little tense, yet his grip on her hand was gentle. What did it mean?

[ex-Lurker]

Sadly, she never got to find out, as a large slime mold astride a polka-dotted chair came crashing through the ceiling.
"Princess Evelyn, the Kingdom of Slooberopapus require aid from its rightful ruler!"
(What rails?)

[Digital Dolphin]

Evelyn shook the hallucination away. "When could I have been drugged" she wondered, shortly before the ground erupted with lava, and the sky began tearing itself into shreds. Her consciousness slowly fading, she had but one chance left...

[Timelady]

With one desperate glance behind her, Evelyn ripped open her blouse and fell forward into Evan's arms. "SLOOBEROOPALOO, I CHOOSE YOU!" she shouts, before darkness overwhelmed her.

"Man," Exclaimed Evan to the purple snake doing the macarena beside them while he held her up, "Whatever they gave us, it is good stuff."

[ex-Lurker]

"The best", agreed the trenchcoat-wearing mammoth "imported straight from Glisterland you see, fucks you up like nothing else".

[Laurnil]

(I feel like this has turned into a psychotropic drug novel rather than a romance novel.)

Evan passed out soon thereafter.

They both awoke naked in each other's arms and in a wonderfully luxurious room. Evelyn didn't feel like she had had sex nor did she feel like Evan would go so far as to drug and rape her, even if he might be trying to kill her.

"What happened? Did we....?" said Evan.

"I don't think so." replied Evelyn.

Evan cocked an eyebrow and gave a devilish smile. "You want to?"

[King Kool]

"You want to what?" Asked Evelyn.

"You know..." Evan delivered a gentle elbow beneath the sheets.

"No, I don't." Evelyn said plainly.

"Actually, I don't, either." Evan confessed. "I was hoping you would."

"You can't remember much of what happened last night, can you?"

"I can't remember much of anything."

"Me, either." Evelyn cradled her chin in her hand, and with the others, pulled up the sheets and peeked at what lurked underneath. "Well, we're two smart people. We should be able to figure this one out."

[Elomin Sha]

That's when they realised how light is both a wave and a particle.

[Laurnil]

As Evelyn stood, naked, in awe of this realization, Evan came up behind her and began to sensually rub her back and shoulders. She moaned as she felt the pressure release from her. He began to kiss her softly on the nape of her neck and run his fingers softly along the side of her abdomen, slowly making their way to her breasts.

[Jamfalcon]

Before his fingers could travel any further, she heard a ferocious pounding on the door.

"Police, we have a warrant!" a voice snarled.

Evelyn turns to look at Evan. "You know what this means, don't you?" she asked calmly.

[My pseudonym is Ix]

[This is rapidly turning into one of the funniest things I have seen here; less thanks to the content, and more thanks to the titanic ongoing battle between Laurnil, Elomin and everyone else]

[Laurnil]

"Yes, it means the TV is on too loudly."

Evan switches off the TV and continues where he left off. He cups one of Evelyn's breasts and she lets out a soft gasp. His other hand travels down her abdomen and slides his fingers between her legs, softly caressing her inner thigh, moving ever so slowly upwards.

[the others be damned! I will make this sexy!]

[Elomin Sha]

towards her thorax.

[LogicSword]

His hand continued to move upwards, and upwards, until he could feel something soft and wet.

"DAMMIT EVAN! What did you poke me in the eye for?"

[Laurnil]

[*squints angrily at Elomin and LogicSword*]

He then, again, rubs sensually on her back. Then, he again runs his hand down her stomach. The chills she feels are amazing. She turns and kisses him passionately on the mouth and he takes her into his arms. She wraps her legs around him and he holds her against the wall.

[LogicSword]

"BRING ON THE WALL!" A voice shouted.

[Jamfalcon]

"I hope this building is structurally sound..." Evan began, with a snide grin. Evelyn didn't pay enough attention to hear the second half of the comment, as she was too busy pondering the meaning of her sudden shifts in tense. Sometimes it seemed like she was looking back on these events, but at other she knows that she is in the moment.

( )

[Laurnil]

It was Evelyn. She was surprised at her own passion. Evan, too, look surprised and he knew she wanted him. Then, in the fire of both their passions, he slide himself deep into her. Evelyn moaned with delight; he fit perfectly.

[take that all you haters. I did it! I made it sexy!]