Back By Popular Demand, It's Famous Last Words!

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Prospero101
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 20 Feb 2014, 09:34

Curiously, he usually wrote tragedies and other similarly pessimistic works. He wrote only one comedy ("Ah, Wilderness!"). I get the feeling that there was an element of bitterness rather than wit in his dying remarks.

Even so, his plays are extremely intelligent, and really ushered in the American branch of the realist movement started by Heinrik Ibsen and Anton Chekhov. I recommend "Lazarus Laughed," "The Iceman Cometh," and "Mourning Becomes Electra."

Bear in mind that his plays are better digested when performed rather than read. It's not like Shakespeare where you can just sit down and get the whole experience.
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"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Hepheastus » 21 Feb 2014, 02:35

Prospero101 wrote:Sorry for the missed days, folks. I've been having a little trouble sleeping lately, and it's hard to summon the energy sometimes. But I'm back, and I'm just going to fire off three quick ones to make up for the gap.


I know entirely how you feel :P
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 21 Feb 2014, 06:31

Blargh! I've thrown off my groove. Need to get back in the habit of doing it first thing in the morning.

Let's move on to a grab bag, unless anyone has another theme they'd like to see.

The economist John Maynard Keynes said, "I wish I'd drunk more champagne."


Comedian and writer W. C. Fields said, "God damn this whole fucking world and everyone in it except you, Carlotta." His wife was named Hattie. Carlotta was his mistress.
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Robo4900 » 21 Feb 2014, 08:30

Prospero101 wrote:Blargh! I've thrown off my groove.

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Prospero101 wrote:Comedian and writer W. C. Fields said, "God damn this whole fucking world and everyone in it except you, Carlotta." His wife was named Hattie. Carlotta was his mistress.[/b]

Fantastic. XD
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 22 Feb 2014, 18:10

Hotel magnate Conrad Hilton, when asked if he had any parting words of wisdom, said, "Always leave the shower curtain on the inside of the tub."

This is good advice, though I would have preferred "Send my granddaughter Paris to a convent or something."
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 23 Feb 2014, 19:43

Groucho Marx, witty to the end, said, "Die, my dear? Why, that's the last thing I'll do!"
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Robo4900 » 24 Feb 2014, 00:47

IIRC Groucho Marx(Possibly one of the other Marx Brothers) bombed Japan(Pretty sure it was Japan, although it's possible that I'm wrong) in World War 2.
(Sorry about the uncertainty of the details -- it was in a QI episode from a few years back)
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby RedNightmare » 24 Feb 2014, 02:48

Suggestion for a themed week: How about a week of last words of comedians?
"I wouldn't call myself an evil genius. Simply genius will suffice."

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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 24 Feb 2014, 06:27

Dammit, Red! AFTER I used W. C. Fields? Yeah, sure, we can do comedians. Groucho seems a good place to start.

SNL titan Chris Farley said, "Don't leave me. Please don't leave me," to a prostitute as she was leaving his hotel room. By the time she turned around, Farley had collapsed and died.

At least he didn't wind up living in a van down by the river.
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"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Lord Hosk » 24 Feb 2014, 07:00

interesting note, David Spade feels incredibly guilty about Chriss Farley's death, he had been on and off drugs for several months most often going back to them when he was bored and alone.

Chris called up david the afternoon before his death and said something to the effect of "please come over I dont want to be alone today man, I really want to just hang out, we can go to a bar or something" David spade just felt like vegging for the day and made up an excuse then stayed home and did just that. the next day he got the phone call and it ruined him, he almost didn't make it to the funeral because he felt he was responsible for Chris' death.
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 25 Feb 2014, 20:23

American humorist James Thurber, famous for his columns and comic strips in the New Yorker, said, "God bless. God damn..."
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 26 Feb 2014, 19:53

George Bernard Shaw said, "Dying is easy. Comedy is hard." What? He was a playwright, but a funny one, dammit.
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby RedNightmare » 27 Feb 2014, 10:07

He was also right, comedy is damn hard!
"I wouldn't call myself an evil genius. Simply genius will suffice."

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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 01 Mar 2014, 09:31

BLARGH.

Actress and comedienne Lucille Ball, when asked if there was anything she wanted, said, "My Florida water."

When a priest told him, "May God have mercy on your soul," Charlie Chaplin said, "Well, why not? It belongs to him."

American humorist O. Henry said, "Turn up the lights - I don't want to go home in the dark!"
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Robo4900 » 01 Mar 2014, 10:31

Try writing yourself a sticky note and putting it next to your monitor.
"If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes should fall like a house of cards. Checkmate."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 01 Mar 2014, 10:34

I have a laptop. That probably won't work. Maybe I'll figure out if my phone can give me notifications or something.
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Robo4900 » 01 Mar 2014, 12:37

Ah, if you're using Windows 7, you can leave a note on your desktop.

Alternatively, leave a piece of paper in the closed laptop so that when you open it, you'll see your note.

Then again, it would probably be easier to just use your phone if you can.
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby AdmiralMemo » 01 Mar 2014, 21:45

I always wondered how a candy bar got named after O. Henry.
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 02 Mar 2014, 07:08

Actually that has nothing to do with the humorist. The candy company that made the Oh Henry had this layabout named Henry show up from time to time to flirt with the girls working there. After a while they made him useful by saying "Oh, Henry! Could you do this for me?" "Oh, Henry! Could you do that too?"

And eventually they named a candy bar after him.

EDIT: To avoid a double post, I'm going to put Oscar Wilde here. "Either that wallpaper goes, or I do."
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby My pseudonym is Ix » 02 Mar 2014, 08:16

Personally I prefer Wilde's quip earlier that evening as he sipped champagne "I am dying beyond my means"
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 06 Mar 2014, 08:30

Folks, it looks like I'm going to need to put the thread on an exceedingly brief hiatus (like, until Saturday or Sunday). I'm in the middle of the wham-bam of a new job and I need to get everything sorted out.
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby empath » 06 Mar 2014, 17:02

GOOD LUCK WITH THE NEW JOB - that's far more important; we can wait patiently for more lols & infos.
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 08 Mar 2014, 16:10

Don't call it a comb-back. I'll have hair for years. (Also I don't really feel like playing catch-up.)

The Ides of March are nearly upon us! March 15 is a week from today, and to celebrate this week is going to be all about Roman emperors!

We'll start with a classic (although they are all, technically, classical). Nero said, "What an artist the world is losing in me!"

Nero is most famous for being something of an ass-cactus, especially pertaining to the huge fire that devastated Rome in 64 AD. It was suspected that Nero plotted the fire to clear out some of the older, slummier parts of the city (it didn't help that he built a massive fuckoff palace in the ruins). More colloquially, "Nero fiddled while Rome burned." There's not really any evidence either way on this one, since Nero was at his vacation home in Dalmatia (modern day Croatia) at the time.

Also he wouldn't have technically been fiddling, as the violin hadn't been invented yet. He played the lute, and was by all accounts really terrible at it.
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 09 Mar 2014, 18:04

Vespasian said, "Woe is me! I think I'm becoming a god!"

While this at first may seem self-aggrandizing, there's an undercurrent of bitter wit to it. See, it was rather traditional (TRADITIONAL) for an emperor to be deified after death, given a shrine, a feast day, and so on. Vespasian DESPISED this idea, and considered it blasphemy.

But how else do you get such runny feces on such a pointy stick? TRADITIOOOOOOOOOON!

(On a side note, what are some of your favorite history books or other media? I want some stuff that digs really deep.)
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."
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Re: 365 Famous Last Words for 2014

Postby Prospero101 » 10 Mar 2014, 20:11

Gah! Quick before bed post so I don't forget again.

Augustus, the first real emperor, said "Now applaud. The play is over." This is the traditional ending phrase to a Roman play. I guess they had to be reminded. Sort of reminds me how at the end of Mass we say "Thank God it's over."

Nighty night.
It's all over but the crying. And the taxes.

"Perfectionism might look good in his shiny shoes, but he's kind of an asshole and no one invites him to their pool parties."

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