Wish Corrupting Game

[Keab42]

Granted. Earthquakes and Volcanoes are exciting right?

I wish for a forum rank.

[Geoff_B]

Granted. Your rank is " ".

I wish these updates would download faster.

[Lord Hosk]

Granted, but the installer is broken.

I wish my ankle didn't hurt.

[Kirkygirl]

Granted, you don't have ankles, or a foot. Your foot was amputated several years ago from a horrendously bad break.

I wish that I wasn't sick right now.

-Kirkygirl

[Fezzul]

Granted, you are now a pussy

I wish I didn't have to be so crass...

[plummeting_sloth]

Congratulations! You are now erudite to the point of incomprehensibility from being possessed by the spirit of William Buckley.

I wish I could get on QI.

[Lord Hosk]

granted, you are now a coward.

I wish good food didnt make you gain weight.

[plummeting_sloth]

Done! All calories have been removed from food! We'll all die of starvation inside the next month.

I wish I could quit you.

[Lord Hosk]

NOT Granted! If you quit me your brain would implode.

I wish you wouldn't try to get rid of me!

[Geoff_B]

Granted. Hairballs are also included.

I wish it wasn't Monday.

[madhousezack]

Granted, Time has now ended, along with the universe. We're all dead.
I wish I was a sith lord

[Geoff_B]

Granted. Your apprentice murders you in your sleep.

I wish we had flying cars already

[Lord Hosk]

granted, but as expected people cant handle them so automobile fatalities skyrocket to 78% of all drivers.

I wish computers made us a paperless society like they promised in the 70's.

[Drdiggit42]

Granted now (s)he annoys you by poking you endlessly.

I wish I could manage my free time better.

[Gap Filler]

Granted. They know you did it. Live with the shame.

I wish, fervently, that I did not at this very moment have a bruised penis.

[Geoff_B]

Granted. Eat lots of curry. That'll do the job.

I wish I hadn't eaten those noodles at lunchtime.

[Keab42]

Granted, you are now hungry.

I wish I didn't to eat so much food.

[plummeting_sloth]

Congratulations! You've just won the world famous "Switch Places with a Darfur Refugee" contest!

I wish I could be a virtuoso of a classical instrument.

[Lord Hosk]

Congratulations! You've just won the world famous "Switch Places with a Darfur Refugee" contest!

Congratulations you a now the ultimate master of the Psaltery, unfortunately no one is exactly sure what one looked like or how to construct one.


I wish my headphones would quit popping out of the socket.

[the amativeness]

Granted. You're now heavyset due to reverse liposuction treatments.

I wish my first cruise assignment gave me an overnight stay in Victoria so that I could visit the LRR crew.

[Dutch guy]

Granted, you don't get shore leave though. Have fun on a ship in harbour!

I wish I hadn't slacked off so much during the holidays and gotten some homework done properly.

[Gap Filler]

Granted. Getting work done came at the expense of holiday time which could have been spent more importantly with family and friends.

I wish the Courvoisier VS Cognac didn't overpower the taste of this iced rich fruit cake so much.

[plummeting_sloth]

Congratulations! Oregon is being invaded by the merciless mutant hordes. Meat shield jobs for everybody!

I wish there were more canals in Baltimore.

[Geoff_B]

Granted. Baltimore is now one huge mega canal.

I wish this cough would go away.

[General Michi]

Granted, your cough leaves through your mouth through a continuous series of involuntary gasps

I wish my exams were over