Wish Corrupting Game

[Drecon]

Granted. Your friends and family make for a great treat.

I wish I had the skills to compete is Strip Search.

[My pseudonym is Ix]

Granted. You go out in the first round, and mike and jerry can't think of anything nice to say.

I wish I understood my new phone properly.

[Smeghead]

Granted! You now understand your phone perfectly, 1 day before the factory recalls them all because they are highly radioactive.

I wish the weekends were longer

[ex-Lurker]

Granted, no work means no pay, have fun starving.

I wish N. Korea will sort its shit out and stop trying to blow everyone up.

[My pseudonym is Ix]

Granted. They stop trying and start doing.

I wish I could think of something fun to do.

[Smeghead]

Granted, you now can; only it turns out that strapping dynamite to a barrel full of snakes placed in a shopping cart rolling down a crowded street might be illegal.

I wish the world economy would recover.

[DmitriW]

Granted, but it now uses bacon as currency, making it completely unavailable as a foodstuff.

I wish my back and head would stop aching.

[DSmaster21]

Granted. Your head stops existing.

I wish for more wishes.

[Smeghead]

Granted! You can now wish for anything at anytime anywhere forever, but there is no one that will grant any of them.

I wish that this wish wouldn't be corrupted

[Ptangmatik]

Granted! You could have wished for anything; World peace, a cure for all types of cancer, wealth, fame, a reeeeaaallllllyyyyy good sandwich. But no, you wished for nothing but that the wish comes true. Well it's granted. You are left with a sense of quiet despair and wasted opportunity.

I wish that whoever grants my wish explodes

[My pseudonym is Ix]

Granted. I am standing next to you.

My remains spell out on the ground 'I wish I hadn't just been blown to pieces'

[DSmaster21]

Granted. You do not blow up and now you have broken the thread. Congrats.

I wish that I could fix the thread.

[Arikele]

Granted, but in order to do so you must first live through every corrupted wish.


I wish I could motivate myself to do things.

[DmitriW]

Granted. You are now thoroughly motivated to play polka, poorly, alienating your friends and relatives.

I wish this thread wasn't so appealing to me.

[Ptangmatik]

Granted! Paranoia worms drilling into the language centers of your brain convert all the text in this thread from harmless/dark witticisms into insults directed at yourself and your mother.

I wish that cupboardy was a real word

[DmitriW]

I'll murder you! My mother's a saint! Your ass is grass, buddy!

(Granted, cupboardy is a word in an obscure and dying tribal language in the Pacific. It is synonymous for "one who copulates with tuna."

I wish I could read this thread properly again.)

[Arikele]

Granted, you have a horrible accident a now suffer from total retrograde amnesia, you remember nothing about your past.

I wish losing weight was easier.

[DmitriW]

Granted, you lose 8 pounds in 30 seconds via decapitation--congrats!

I wish I wasn't quite so morbid.

[ex-Lurker]

Granted, you hate your new upbeat personality but can never change back.

I wish the background of this website is yellow.

[Heald]

Granted, however with the background change the text also gets turned to yellow.

I wish I had a sandwich, I'm hungry

[CaptainEnder7]

Granted! The original Earl of Sandwich appears in your room. Unfortunately he's been dead since 1672.

I wish I could teleport.

[DSmaster21]

Granted. You can only teleport by giving yourself a swirly.

I wish I had a familiar.

[DmitriW]

Granted. You are now forever followed by a particularly jumpy skunk.

I wish I were more social.

[ex-Lurker]

Granted, you never get a moment to yourself.

I wish I have better pencils.

[Smeghead]

Granted. You have better pencils just as the world starts taking the whole "Paperless society" thing seriously.

I wish the next wish in this thread wasn't corrupted.