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Granted, the game is outsourced to EA and has Ubisofts DRM scheme

I wish Meet the Pyro would come out.

Granted, but the Pyro's a spy

I wish, I wish, I was a fish

Granted: i ate you though

i wish, i wish, i did not eat that fish

Granted, it ate you instead.

I wish I wasn't so bored.

Granted, you are now locked in a glass bubble falling to earth from 40.000 feet. Have fun while it lasts.

I wish finding an intership wasn't so hard.

Granted, you just found a boat with "Inter" written on it.

I wish my feet were hands.

Granted, you are now a mutated capucin monkey used in a lab for experiments about pain.

I wish I could spell

Granted; your past is changed - now you could spell, once.

I wish the bathroom was closer.

Granted, now everything smells like shit.

I wish I would wash a watch with warped wine while working within Windows to win a wondrous whining Wii wasp... In england.

Granted, however you quickly realise it's actuall a very boring task made interesting by the brief aliteration gimick that gets boring very quickly.

I wish England were good at football.

Granted. But the U.S gets better with them.

(Topical humour! )

I wish that I could write faster. Without burning my paper...

Granted, your keyboard melts when you use it.

I wish I had a top hat, a monocle and a thin curly mustache.

Granted, but everyone now knows you are a melodrama villain.

I wish Emerald Ash Borers weren't eating my ash trees.

Granted. The England squad are eating them instead.

I wish I didn't have to suppress the urge to set fire to those stupid little England flags that everybody puts on their car for sporting events.

Granted, but with the English moral depleted, there is nothing to stop the invasion of the Americans.

I wish I could see the Doctor Who finale now.

Granted, you now have all 30 season finales to choose from.

I wish I wouldn't have to wait for Futurama to start again.

Granted.The new episodes were a hoax.

I wish I had a talk like a pirate T-shirt.

Granted, it's a womans 2XS.

I wish I had something tasty to eat for breakfast.

Granted, but you slept in and now its cold

I wish my friends knew how to play Pathfinder and I didn't have to explain EVERY rule to them.

Granted, but with it they learn Klingon and forget every other language they know.

I'm cold. I wish I was slightly warmer.

Granted, you now are a human that produces excessive heat, and now have to eat constantly. Additionally, now that whenever you leave the room people scream at you to either come back or stay out depending on if it's winter or summer.

I wish to have the ability to remember all my dreams and to be able to understand them, especially the clairvoyant ones I have. (seriously. I have clairvoyant dreams! It's kinda fun...)

-Kirkygirl

Ok, but I hope you enjoy remembering all of your dreams in excruciating detail, forever, so even the memory of past nightmares fill you with the terror you felt the first time experiencing them.

I wish my cat would only deposit her waste fluids either outside in the yard or in her regularly cleaned litter box.

Granted! Your cat has been sealed in concrete with it's rear end exposed. Now it will poop where ever you want it to!

I wish I had decided to play hockey this summer.

Granted, you're the only one who did.

I wish the LHC will result in some interesting new discoveries.

Yes! Like exactly how expensive it is to keep fixing something so complex.

I wish I wasn't feeling so melancholy today.