Nanorhino

[Avistew]

This is a thread to post your submissions for the Nanorhino challenged that happened earlier.

To remind everyone of the rules: it needed to be exactly 100 words, feature a tiny rhinoceros, have an honorific in it and some sort of citrus explosive. We had 25 minutes to write and submit them

Here is my entry:

'It's quite a cute pet you have here, Count Busworth, Sir', the door-to-door salesman commented.
The dwarf rhinoceros seemed aggressive, but he was used to that sort of thing. As long as the owner kept a tight grip on the leash, he would be fine. And at any rate, he could run fast. That came with the job.
He gave a warm smile to the man holding the pet back. 'I'm representing Cherry-Lime Bomb Incorporated. You would be suprised how useful these tiny explosive are in day-to-day life.'
The Count slamed the door shut. Man, these salesmen were getting annoying.

Feel free to post yours!

[JustAName]

Here's mine!

Duke Harris von Harrisburg III was not having a good day. His plot to topple the empire of his supreme rival Sir Osteropolopolis had failed miserably when the unbearable fop evaded his deadly traps, not even a hair on his immaculately groomed head out of place. Oranges were too volatile, the Duke reflected as he paced his richly furnished study, but limes didn’t have the kind of energy output to cause serious damage when thrown.
There was only one solution, he thought grimly, and pressed the intercom button on his desk. “Get me rhinos. The smallest ones you can find.”

[Evil Jim]

I don't believe they explicitly said it had to be exactly 100 words. I imagine they didn't have time to wordcount each entry. Mine went over a little bit but not too much. I was really hoping to win this one but perhaps the style threw Kate off a bit. It's a radio-drama type script.

BOND IN PERIL

By Evil Jim

Episode 2

NARRATOR: We last left our exciting story as a lone figure was hurled out of a gaping hole in the side of an airplane flying over an uncharted coastal region of Wild Africa! The lemon-battery powered bomb had caused the explosion that freed him of his evil terrorist captors, but only long enough to fall into the cold embrace of Doom. Join us once again as we continue with the incredible adventures of... Archduke Bond!

As the ground comes rushing up to meet him ever faster, he notices one critical detail that might save his life!

BOND: Wow, those rhinos look so tiny from up here.

NARRATOR: Uh... er, ...so tune in again to hear the next thrilling episode of Archduke Bond!

[Fezzul]

Mine is 96 words:

“Love is the strangest thing,” said the tiny albino rhino to the block of cheddar he had carved in to the shape of a woman, “I don’t think there’s anything stranger.” The tiny albino rhino had spent years carving the cheddar, finishing it only the day before. As he looked at it, tears came in to his tiny albino rhino eyes. “So strange is love. So strange.” He took one last look at the foodstuff, and slowly walked away. His tiny albino rhino hooves clicking on the floor. He left a trail of cheese behind him.

[Avistew]

I thought it had to be 100 words. I was slightly over so I had to remove a sentence (Which I believe was something like "the size of cherries with all the power of limes!" or something) and as a result I was under and had to add elsewhere... I was so stressed out, too. But that's because at first they said 15 minutes and I didn't realise they had upgraded it to 25 so I submitted it around 10 minutes.
I probably could have worked on it more... Oh well.

I was surprised by how much I enjoy writing with that many restrictions though. It was a lot of fun, I had more inspiration than usual.

Oh, by the way, my entry was entitled "The downfalls of having a door".

[Fezzul]

The two that won were exactly 100 each. So that's food for thawt I suppose.

[Avistew]

Also, come to think of it, the writer guy who started the whole "NanaRhino" thing said his advice to writers was to apply to places and follow the requirements to the letter because they get so many submissions they'll look for excuses to eliminate submissions without having to read them. Whether that happened or not in desert bus, I think it's a bad idea not to follow the advice that was just given on the feed right before the challenge was started...

[DancingFox]

The word exactly wasn't used, I don't think. Over would probably disqualify, but I figured they'd take under. Mine was still exactly 100 cause it came out like 105 and then I pared it down, although wordcounted it reads 99 because of ellipses.



They always mocked me. But they mocked Cave Johnson and his lemons too and where were those damn critics now? Burned to death, that’s where.
I spotted a flicker of movement beneath a bush, and leapt into motion, scrabbling in the dust on the side of the Arizona highway. I felt my fingers close on the tiny animal and shouted out in success, raising my hand to my eyes…Another lizard. Damn.
I’d show them. I knew Ceratotherium Minimus was out here somewhere. And I would prove it to High Grand Commissar Scalzi President of Science, with a live specimen.

[Myrph]

I took it in the same vein as Tim's 50 word stories and the original drabble, so made sure mine was 100 words exactly...

When they drafted me for rebel efforts, I didn’t believe they’d handpicked me because of my skills as a zoo keeper.

That was when I discovered what their newest weapon was. Nanorhinos. And they wanted me, of all people, to train them.

I won’t lie, it was the most surreal experience my life, but at the end of it, I felt like I was the king of the world’s angriest flea circus!

We weren’t the only unusual initiative that they were testing though, and unfortunately that would be our downfall.

Turns out nanorhinos don’t particularly enjoy snacking on combustible lemons.

I would like to make it known that I was severely sleep deprived when I wrote that, so cannot be held at all accountable!

[phlip]

The newly‐appointed King Fred of the Moon had a problem.

He had ascended to kinghood in the usual way—he assassinated the previous king, using a specially‐prepared explosive lime; one which, on detonation, released a cluster of miniature rhinoceroses to attack the target. It worked perfectly, and was set to go into the record books as the most critically‐acclaimed assassination in the nation's rich history. But now that this has all been achieved… what could he do with his rule? How could he possibly top that?

The King turned to his assigned trusted advisor.

"What now?"

It's 100 words exactly as long as you count the hyphenated pairs as separate words.