Feminism general thread

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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Garwulf » 10 Jul 2014, 20:33

I'm a classical feminist, I guess. I think Mary Wollstonecraft put it best - equality for one half of the human race, without waging a vendetta against or punishing the other half. Basically, she recognized that for equality to happen, women had to be elevated to the same level as men, as opposed to men being brought down a peg, or women first being brought to the same level and then exceeding men. At the end of this is meritocracy, which is really how the world should work, I think.

Unfortunately, there is an element of feminism called Marxist, or "Red" feminism, which basically took Karl Marx' narrative of class warfare, and applied it to gender issues. So, instead of working towards elevating the status of women to the same level of men, they wanted to abolish men, and anything resembling a traditional family structure (marriage, nuclear families, etc.). This basically is taking misandry, or the hatred of men, and slapping a feminist label on it, and these feminists were very vocal.

This "Red" feminism I am not very fond of at all. Nobody should have their worth judged based on genitalia. There are places, such as the family courts, where women who were basically clearly sociopaths were given custody over children who later suffered and sometimes even died, and the choice of custody was made due to gender rather than merit. I don't know if Marxist feminism was behind this, or it happened individually, but it is wrong.

The thing I do know they're behind is the very skewed image we have of domestic violence. If you look up somebody named Erin Pizzey, you get a very startling story. She opened up one of the first women's shelters in the UK, and one of the things she very quickly realized was that domestic violence was not a gender issue, that it was often reciprocal, and that women were just as likely to be abusive as men. Her findings were basically suppressed by the Red feminist movement, as domestic violence was a place they could use the men vs. women narrative. In all seriousness, look her up - there are some very good long-lasting things that feminism has done, but some very bad things too, and her story is eye-opening.

(I think a CDC study found that around 25% of relationships have some level of domestic violence, and of those 50% have mutual and reciprocal violence, while in the other 50% the sex of the abusive partner was evenly split between men and women. So, the implication is that of all the victims of domestic abuse, 75% have not received the help they needed due to this men vs. women narrative.)

Anyway, there are some feminists who I have the utmost respect for, such as Anita Sarkeesian. But misandry should never be disguised as feminism, and the minute a feminist makes a value judgement about men based solely on gender, she (or he) loses my respect.

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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Alex Steacy » 10 Jul 2014, 20:36

auberginequeen wrote:What twisted logic when apparently wearing any outfit that isn't skin-tight boobtastic spandex is dressing "like a man." I wonder what on earth she wears, because apparently it's not clothing.


These are the exact people that get pointed to as if they're evidence that feminism is institutionalized manhatred. They're a horrible boat anchor on the cause and need to be strongly disassociated from it.

Fascinating stuff above. Like everything else, we must be careful to not make feminism beyond reproach or immune to criticism. That way lies madness.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby betsytheripper » 10 Jul 2014, 20:47

I am definitely a feminist, and I do all I can to educate anyone who is curious about what it is and what it means. I know I'm not really blazing trails, but being a woman in STEM gives me everyday access to educate those that don't understand it, or misunderstand it, and it's an opportunity I take advantage of.

I am quite interested in seeing the discussion about feminism vs egalitarianism unfold here, as more perspectives are always good to have and know, especially when educating others.

With that, I am confused why you, J_S_Bach, staunchly stick with egalitarian. My best analogy is that you say you don't eat sandwiches, but you heartily and enthusiastically take part in a meal of two slices bread with meat, cheese, vegetables and condiments in between them, let's call it handtoast. In your experience, only people who live in the bad side of town eat sandwiches, and you don't want to sound like you're from the bad side of town, so you only eat handtoast. But a sandwich is a sandwich, no matter who is eating it. And hey, maybe someone from the nice part of town will hear you speaking of eating a sandwich and say, "hey, maybe it's okay for me to eat sandwiches, too."

I hope this conveys some of my confusion. I think we should just call a sandwich a sandwich. Is it possible to agree to that? Definitely, any extremist viewpoints need to be dealt with, but that's true for any group trying to make sure the loudest ones aren't the craziest/extremist ones. See this handy SMBC Comic regarding loudest vs extremist.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Alex Steacy » 10 Jul 2014, 20:49

That strip is REALLY on point.

Also now I'm hungry for some reason.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby auberginequeen » 10 Jul 2014, 20:56

Garwulf wrote:(I think a CDC study found that around 25% of relationships have some level of domestic violence


I went to look up domestic violence as this number surprised me and found that the page "Epidemiology of Domestic Violence" was listed as "Part of a series on Violence against Women" - so that was interesting.

Re: Distancing oneself from the crazies

Almost no one wants to be associated with the "manhaters," that's clear. Unfortunately the default response is to distance themselves from the movement rather than distancing the movement from the extremists. Of course, it's a lot easier to reject the movement than to change other people's minds about it, and so that's what most people do. The problem is ultimately that extremists tend to cling all the more tightly to the label, making it central to their identity using it as a sword and shield, making them nearly inseparable from the movement. The harder you try to remove them, the tighter they cling.

The correct way to go about changing people's minds seems to be the same way that all of the other major movements changed the world (gay rights, fighting racism, etc): through small but gradual changes over time by a dedicated, growing group of people. Try our best to educate where possible, and understand that not everyone will agree with it initially, or perhaps ever. That's life. I would argue that it isn't necessary for the movement to have a central name, no less for that name to be "feminism," but as long as we continue to talk about ideas like equality between the sexes, races, and so on, there is still hope. I don't get the hate for the term "egalitarianism" or it being a cop-out. A rose by any other name would smell as sweet. The ideas are what's important.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Matt » 10 Jul 2014, 20:56

Interrupting my run to interject - I dunno, maybe I'm extremely jaded at this point, but I am EXTREMELY dubious of the batgirl story posted a page back.

We are getting one side of this story. I have no doubt that you are honestly reporting what you heard, but I find it improbable in the extreme that that is what she actually said.

In cases of ideological conflict, either due to misunderstanding, or misinterpretation, these stories are retold with such low resolution that any potential texture to the Teacher's argument is lost.

Continuing this discussion does little but attack a strawman.

We aren't debating the merits of a fully formed argument. We are attacking a second hand retelling from a source that openly disclosed their disagreement.

Of course the argument sounds crazy on its face, we're only hearing maybe half of it.

-m

I mean that in the nicest way possible, though. I don't think you're deliberately mischaracterizing the argument, I just don't think it's possible that you have fully conveyed the detail necessary for us to credibly debate it.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Psyclone » 10 Jul 2014, 20:56

Wow, this blew up quickly.

I guess I'm what you'd call a radfem? I'm definitely extremely vocal about my views, and I don't believe in sugarcoating things for cis men/non-feminists. To me the term radfem has very TERF-y connotations, so I'd rather not call myself that.

I've got very hard-line views and I may get some flak for this, but if you say you're basically a feminist but call yourself egalitarian, you're not a feminist. You're not willing to stand with feminists and you're not willing to acknowledge the huge part that cis men play in the oppression of basically everyone else, instead deciding to cloak it in "equality for all". Basically, just man up (sorry for the gendered term) and call yourself a fucking feminist.

Also, in response to a post on the first page: I don't care whether you call yourself a feminist or a feminist ally, but if a woman tells you to call yourself a feminist ally, you'd better listen to her. Feminism is not for you (I mean it is, but you don't get to hijack it like that), and you have to listen to women on this one.

So yes. I know not every feminist feels the same way I do, but this is where I stand and I think that's what this thread is for; I've sort of forgotten at this point. And can I just say I'm so glad that most of the posts here have been really positive? I saw this thread and went 'oh no, this is going to be such a mess,' but I was really pleasantly surprised.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Loslomo » 10 Jul 2014, 20:58

I'm s feminist because when my grandmother opened her first hardware store here in Portland one of her peers (that is, another store owner) said "well shit, if I had known, I would have bought it."

To this day, even after nearly 20 years of growth and good business practice, we still get the occasional backward person who "would rather speak to a man". We usually hear out their request then go ask one of our female bodied employees the answer, even if we know the answer, just to snub them.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby J_S_Bach » 10 Jul 2014, 21:01

Here is the definition of feminism that has been taught to me: "the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men."

And this is my definition of egalitarianism: "the doctrine of the equality of all people and the desirability of political and economic and social equality"

The most vocal feminists here are only concerned with the plight of women and have an attitude of let's fix our thing and then we'll move on to whatever it is you want. That's not how I feel. My social group is more of the mind that everyone's problems are equal. In Fredericton the vocal feminists have done great work, I will not deny that, however there is a huge problem with homophobia that they do not want to address because they don't feel that it is that important, but I do.

I do not want to call myself a feminist because the majority of feminists I have seen have not treated people with the equality they deserve and that is why I stick to so staunchly to egalitarianism.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Alex Steacy » 10 Jul 2014, 21:03

Psyclone, do you not think taking such a hard stance is going to damage your cause? I do what I can to make feminism inviting to people, because I think framing it as an exclusive club one must swear a solemn oath to scares people off. Whether or not that's a reasonable reaction is irrelevant - being more concerned with the purity of the movement than its victory isn't going to do much for recruiting, much less progress.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Psyclone » 10 Jul 2014, 21:07

Psyclone, do you not think taking such a hard stance is going to damage your cause? I do what I can to make feminism inviting to people, because I think framing it as an exclusive club one must swear a solemn oath to scares people off. Whether or not that's a reasonable reaction is irrelevant - being more concerned with the purity of the movement than its victory isn't going to do much for recruiting, much less progress.

It's funny that you say that, because as much as I'd like to be just as hard as I actually feel, I'm a total pushover who will bend over backwards to accommodate people and try to educate them and draw them in. I wish I wasn't and I wish I could stick to my principles, but there you have it.

I guess I feel that way because I'm very conscious of how many "safe spaces" are unsafe because feminists who do not fully understand feminism make them that way? I'm not sure how well I'm articulating this.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Deedles » 10 Jul 2014, 21:10

J_S_Bach wrote:The problem I've had when I share with very vocal feminists that I'm an egalitarian is usually the response of "if you're not with us than you're against us".

I believe that all people should be treated equally, in New Brunswick there are a lot of feminists who believe that women's issues should be addressed first and I know that is not the case for every feminist everywhere. My opinion on the matter is that because New Brunswick is typically a lot more conservative than somewhere, like say, British Columbia, the push back from the feminists here in NB is on the more radical/batshit end of the bell curve.

I do not call myself a feminist because where I live that has several negative connotations that I do not want to be associated with. Here we call it egalitarianism, and perhaps what we call egalitarianism is what you call feminism and I'm alright with that, so why do people have an issue with me saying: "I'm an egalitarian" are you saying that it isn't as good as feminism? To me that sounds a little hypocritical.

One of the things that sparked this forum was a tweet I sent to Alex about the new redesign of Batgirl design http://www.themarysue.com/new-batgirl-creative-team/ I was at the campus because it has the best Tim Hortons in the city and I overheard one of the extremist feminist professors talking about this new design (which as far as I know was only revealed today) and using it as an example of the toxic comic book industry for women. The main point I heard her make was that she had issue with the leather jacket. Her claim was that the jacket was being used to hide Batgirl's breasts in a form of body shaming. The prof claimed it to be further proof that if a woman wants to make it as a superhero she must look like a man or be putting her body on display.


I want to add something that actually contributes to the discussion, but the fact that someone called that design sexist just... what do?
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Alex Steacy » 10 Jul 2014, 21:12

Psyclone wrote:It's funny that you say that, because as much as I'd like to be just as hard as I actually feel, I'm a total pushover who will bend over backwards to accommodate people and try to educate them and draw them in. I wish I wasn't and I wish I could stick to my principles, but there you have it.

I guess I feel that way because I'm very conscious of how many "safe spaces" are unsafe because feminists who do not fully understand feminism make them that way? I'm not sure how well I'm articulating this.



I think what you're doing re: accomodation and education is much more valuable than playing bouncer outside the feminist club.

And I'm sorry to hear about safe spaces becoming unsafe - to which I would say that the solution is still more education so that everyone knows what's up and regulate as a group, enlightening or ejecting those that don't or won't get it.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby betsytheripper » 10 Jul 2014, 21:16

I'd like to point out and for everyone to keep in mind that, as I understand it, third wave, or modern, feminism is also about the inclusivity of LGBTQ rights, the continued advancement of civil rights, and the visibility of women, queers, and persons of color in society. It rejects second wave feminism to a certain extent in that it made feminism an upper-middle class white woman's movement. Modern feminism is about fixing many aspects of society, while maintaining the inertia of the feminist movement. As a modern feminist, I do certainly care about LGBTQ rights, eliminating racism, and seeing everyone have equal opportunities for any endeavor or dream they should have.

Feminism is not a static thing, but the underlying principle is to bring everyone up to the same, equal level.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Deedles » 10 Jul 2014, 21:22

I'm a feminist, without a doubt, but it actually took me surprisingly long to really identify that there was a problem and that I was a feminist. This is in large part because of the fact that when I had any guy (this is usually within gaming, since those where the places I hung around the most) trying to demean me, or doubted my skill because of my gender, in any way I always took it as a personal insult and challenge instead of an insult to my gender, and would always do my utmost to prove whoever doubted me wrong.

Maybe it's because I felt kinda detached as a female for such a long time(i.e. I knew I was female, but felt more... genderless? It's something I still feel like.), but I've never felt like a victim in a situation like that, and I ... honestly don't know why. Because I can see why other females who have experienced similar, or the same, things feel demeaned because of it, so I don't understand why I never did. Am I simply dense?
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Garwulf » 10 Jul 2014, 21:26

auberginequeen wrote:
Garwulf wrote:(I think a CDC study found that around 25% of relationships have some level of domestic violence


I went to look up domestic violence as this number surprised me and found that the page "Epidemiology of Domestic Violence" was listed as "Part of a series on Violence against Women" - so that was interesting.



I took a moment to look up the study I was referring to - the latest study is here, but it's actually not the one I was recalling - this was is from 2010, but the one I'm thinking about is from 2007 (which I'm having a lot of trouble locating, and it's coming up on 1:30 in the morning here). Anyway, here's the study from 2010: http://www.cdc.gov/ViolencePrevention/pdf/NISVS_Report2010-a.pdf

(I hate it when I can't find something - I'll look a bit more tomorrow, unless somebody else can dig it up tonight.)

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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby auberginequeen » 10 Jul 2014, 21:27

Deedles wrote:Maybe it's because I felt kinda detached as a female for such a long time(i.e. I knew I was female, but felt more... genderless? It's something I still feel like.), but I've never felt like a victim in a situation like that, and I ... honestly don't know why. Because I can see why other females who have experienced similar, or the same, things feel demeaned because of it, so I don't understand why I never did. Am I simply dense?


I've done similar things. Sometimes I read posts by MRAs and I never feel like they're actually talking about me when they say "blah blah women are evil blah." I've never really been sexually harassed either, or catcalled at, or anything, or even made fun of on video games. For example, when I used to play LoL, all the insults I received were about me, not about my gender. The most I've gotten is someone close to me telling me that not everyone likes strong women. I wasn't trying to be a strong woman, I was just being myself.

@Garwulf: Thanks for the literature. :)
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Psyclone » 10 Jul 2014, 21:28

Betsytheripper, you're absolutely right, but I think a lot of people are still stuck at the second wave 'white feminism' level, which is where a lot of problems within feminism arise.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Alex Steacy » 10 Jul 2014, 21:30

People stuck in the stone age causing trouble in the present? Where have we heard that one before?

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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby betsytheripper » 10 Jul 2014, 21:32

Deedles, I have to say I identify with that. It didn't really click for me either until someone straight up told me to my face, "You can't do engineering, you're a woman." I think, like you, I'm not necessarily attached to my gender and at this point in my life actively gender-fuck and blur gender norms, but now I take a bit of pride shoving it in their faces that I am a woman, I am doing engineering, and 60% of my senior project team is women.

And yeah Psyclone, this is why I bring it up. If you're gonna disagree with my movement, at least disagree with the one I'm actually apart of.

[edit: I speel gud.]
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Jurjee » 10 Jul 2014, 21:35

I had a difficult time formulating a post on here. Not for fear of backlash, but that I have difficulty conveying very complex concepts into the written word.

I find it hard to use labels, and try to avoid them as much as possible. It can easily be used as loaded language, and evoke a specific response due to their nature. My satire tweet was partially fueled by this notion of a loaded word.

If by considering women equivalent to men makes me a feminist, then I am. If by my belief that women and men should have equal rights and status makes me egalitarian, then I am. I realize that the scales are tipped in men's favor so much that it's egregious. We have women in power who are largely ignored. It won't get better until women are as respected as men are. One way is to mentor the next generation. Another is spreading awareness.

It's a long road to get to true equivalency and/or equality, but it's well worth the effort.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Alex Steacy » 10 Jul 2014, 21:36

I get the feeling that until people encounter the problem directly, they're less likely to believe it exists - at least on the scale that it does.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Loslomo » 10 Jul 2014, 21:40

to expand on my earlier post, I consider myself a de Beauvoir/existential feminist (if one wishes to use labels) in that I feel that inequality is a societal disease. That it doesn't spring from a person or a group of people working toward inequality (though those do exist), but rather it's our society as a whole that ingrains both the "us v them" dichotomy and the idea "that which is Other (different) is lesser than self, because it is different". in de Beauvoir's case the Other was women, but I feel that can be expanded to include anyone who doesn't fit the "status quo" (white, cisgendered, male, affluent...)

I feel that the best way to overcome this societal illness is to educate and show that, while we are all different in our own ways, we aren't so different from one another as to be alien.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby Deedles » 10 Jul 2014, 21:41

auberginequeen wrote:I've done similar things. Sometimes I read posts by MRAs and I never feel like they're actually talking about me when they say "blah blah women are evil blah." I've never really been sexually harassed either, or catcalled at, or anything, or even made fun of on video games. For example, when I used to play LoL, all the insults I received were about me, not about my gender. The most I've gotten is someone close to me telling me that not everyone likes strong women. I wasn't trying to be a strong woman, I was just being myself.

@Garwulf: Thanks for the literature. :)


I've had my fair share of sexual harassment and people(mostly males) trying to tell me that I'm a bitch for not blindly agreeing with them, because obviously I have to be a bitch because I have my own opinion and the spine to stick to it.

I wonder if it could be, in part, because most of that stuff has come from gaming communities, and I grew up in a household where me and my big sister gamed just as much as my big brothers, and while we had games that we weren't on equal terms on in skill in all games there were some where I was better, or my sister was better, or one of my brothers were better.

betsytheripper wrote:Deedles, I have to say I identify with that. It didn't really click for me either until someone straight up told me to my face, "You can't do engineering, you're a woman." I think, like you, I'm not necessarily attached to my gender and at this point in my life actively gender-fuck and blur gender norms, but now I take a bit of pride shoving it in their faces that I am a woman, I am doing engineering, and 60% of my senior project team is women.

And yeah Psyclone, this is why I bring it up. If you're gonna disagree with my movement, at least disagree with the one I'm actually apart of.

[edit: I speel gud.]


Glad that you're sticking to it, despite someone saying that. Whenever someone's told me that I can't do something because I'm a girl I've gone out of my way to prove them wrong. Some big things, but mostly they're small day to day things, like refusing to do the "girl version" of push-ups in gym class because I refused to put less effort into it than the boys, or being the only girl to join the DIY group when we had a project week at my school, and also being one of the few who was asked to help after school so that we could finish the skateboard ramp we were building in time.
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Re: Feminism general thread

Postby CapnHat87 » 10 Jul 2014, 21:41

Jurjee wrote:I had a difficult time formulating a post on here. Not for fear of backlash, but that I have difficulty conveying very complex concepts into the written word.

I find it hard to use labels, and try to avoid them as much as possible. It can easily be used as loaded language, and evoke a specific response due to their nature. My satire tweet was partially fueled by this notion of a loaded word.

If by considering women equivalent to men makes me a feminist, then I am. If by my belief that women and men should have equal rights and status makes me egalitarian, then I am. I realize that the scales are tipped in men's favor so much that it's egregious. We have women in power who are largely ignored. It won't get better until women are as respected as men are. One way is to mentor the next generation. Another is spreading awareness.

It's a long road to get to true equivalency and/or equality, but it's well worth the effort.


This. This is basically what I've been trying to formulate in my brain for the last X amount of months. I find it too easy for a label to be twisted or bent for me to identify as any one ideal - but the intent is clear: everyone should be given equal treatment, regardless of factors beyond your control, be they age, gender, hair style, whatever. What anyone else wants to label that viewpoint as, that's up to them.

*edit: using phone, have fat fingers.

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