So that just happened (funny MTG stories)

[Lord Hosk]

Tonight at my draft round two I played against a guy I have never seen before who could not sit still. He was flicking his cards before he even got them into his had, his legs were bouncing and he was even Flicking his lands while in play.

After he beat me when I drew 16 lands with 14 cards left in my library he said "Dont worry about me beating you man, I regularly go to day two at PTQ's im really good"

Game two I curved out perfectly on color and wrecked him.

Game three he was getting really agitated because he was running mardu and I was in 5 color morph with two secret plans so he just couldnt swing into my wall of 2/4s he was getting more and more fidgety and flicking.

So I said "are you ok, you are bouncing off the wall, do you need to take a break for a minute we have time, we can ask the judge for an extension"

He just stopped all his flicking and stared at me he drew, played a chief of the edge and passed, sitting perfectly still and waved dismissively.

I untapped, savaged punched his chief against my Snowhorn rider, he had two in hand and WRR up so I said "pass"

Still sitting perfectly still he said "you arent going to attack? thats wasting the +2/+2"

I said "I think you have kill shot Ill wait."

He sneered at me and said "all the pro's flick cards, if you dont know about that you are clearly not good enough to play against" and he scooped his cards and left the store. didnt drop didnt talk to the owner, nothing just grabbed his cards put on his jacket and left.

[Duckay]

Oh, that moment when you keep a hand of 4 lands, Through the Breach and Emrakul... and your opponent has turn 1 Thoughtseize. Thanks, Cube.

Your opponent has sent you a message? Oh?

":P"

[Ceiran]

Holiday cube on no sleep is a bad idea. Spent 15 turns of time-key combo pitching a signet to pack rat and Ruins-ing it back to build up a lethal board presence... And then pass without tapping the time vault.

On 9 life.

With Progenitus staring me down from the other side of the table, mocking my Maze of Ith and sleep addled f6 finger.

[jkefka]

So I was just doing a Fate/Khans/Khans swiss. I was up against a red/blue aggro deck in round 3 (1-1 to that point) and I was playing a deck I've run a couple times now that I call "abzanifest." You can guess how it works.

Anyways, in game 3 we had been swinging back and forth and after a while I have a tapped, manifested Awaken the Bear and an untapped 1G 0/2 mana dork, and he has a Bloodfire expert. I've got six mana up plus the dork, and one card in hand.

He attacks with his expert, I cast my one card, Dragonscale Boon, on his attack step on the manifested thing to make myself a 4/4 to eat his 3/1. He responds with Force Away, putting the Awaken the Bear back in my hand and fizzling the boon. I block with the 0/2 dork and use it and my two remaining lands to Awaken it into a 3/5 and eat his 4/2.

It was hilarious, beautiful, and completely unpredictable.

[Re'ozul]

Not particularly funny, but I got a chuckle out of it.

Test game with my new Ghave based commander deck in 4 player free for all.
Oponent plays Kozilek, both other opponents have deathtouchers out.
I already fear for my life-total.
Next turn he runs his Kozilek straight into the mono-black players deathtoucher. One round earlier I had managed to bring out my mimic vat. Said vat is merely in the deck for situations like this where an enemy has a cool creature I'd like to have.

Copy Kozilek and for the next two rounds I attack his former master with him. The kicker, he was running a mainly-artifact deck and had a Derksteel forge already out. It was fun.

Then he resolved insurrection and pummelled me with my own creatures and those of the other players, still hilarious.

[AdmiralMemo]

So Antitonic and I had a very silly game of Commander today... I'm playing Slivers, with Hivelord as Commander. He's playing Karn Golems. I start with a hand of 3 lands, Hibernation Sliver, Syphon Sliver, Amoeboid Changeling, Door of Destinies, and Chromatic Lantern. So I start off with the Hibernation Sliver, then Changeling, then Syphon. He's got just one creature down, so I just start bashing in with the Syphon and Hibernation. Whichever he blocks, I pull back with Hibernation's ability. If he does block the Hibernation Sliver, I still get life off the Siphon, making it free. Since one of my lands is Ancient Ziggurat, when I stall on mana, I can't get my Lantern and Door out. That's OK, though, because I just cast other small Slivers I draw, like Muscle Sliver. He's just developing his board with Artifacts, not creatures, anyway. I keep developing my board with small Slivers, and FINALLY get a land down. Due to board states, I'd pulled my Syphon and Muscle Slivers back to my hand. That's OK, because my plan is to just cast and pull back repeatedly to get counters on the Door and buff all the Slivers. Also, getting the Lantern down bypasses the restriction of the Ziggurat, so I can get my couple of Changeling instants out. So on one of his turns, he ends up casting Darksteel Forge and his Karnmander. So now, everything on his board, aside from lands, is indestructible. Also, he's got 4 creatures out by now. Welp... I can deal with that. Two can play this game. Cast my commander: Sliver Hivelord. Now I'M indestructible too. However, I've got 6 creatures to his 4, so I think I can just start attacking and whichever two he doesn't block get through... What's this? Oh right... Karn turns artifacts into creatures... DERP... So we've got two indestructible walls looking at each other... Alright... Good thing I've got Quick Sliver out by this point, giving my in-hand Slivers flash. So, he gets out an Arcbound Stinger and I've got no fliers or reach. He's like "36-turn clock?" So I just attack in again. After he blocks, I flash in Muscle Sliver, Syphon Sliver, and Blades of Velis Veil. That's 4 extra power on every sliver and 2 extra temp power on 2 of them... All with lifelink. My life total goes to 91, and I go "91-turn clock?" He's like "Oh, we're going to be playing one of THESE games..." I'm like "You've been gaining life off Golem's Heart for 9 turns. I thought I'd try lifegain out, too." So I keep smashing my indestructible lifegain wall into his indestructible wall and gain life for a couple of turns, while keeping casting more Slivers in hopes that I eventually get more Slivers than he can get artifacts, so I can start getting in through the flanks. He's like "147-turn clock?" I'm like "It's an 80-turn clock before I deck myself." He's like "I've seen Commander games. I doubt that will be the case." I'm like "Yeah, especially with my flying and poisonous Slivers somewhere in there." He ends up saying he has to go soon, just as I'm drawing my next card... I'm like "Oh mama... Can you let me pull off this combo first?" He's like "Of course." So I activate Amoeboid Changeling to give his Karn every creature type. Then I cast Sliver Overlord. I activate it to gain control of Karn. He's like "No! M'robutt!" Then I use it to tutor up Galerider Sliver and cast it. I slam in with everything flying, and I win at 242 to -20.

As with many Commander games, the ending was just straight .
"Your robot's a Sliver now."

[Antitonic]

It was indeed very silly, and I loved every second of it.

[AdmiralMemo]

During a Runners Rise of Eldrazi draft, take a guess why I might attack my opponent with 6 0/1 Eldrazi Spawn tokens.

Silly Interaction - Click to Expand

I had Raid Bombardment out, and I had just cast Wrap in Flames on my opponent's 3 Defenders, so they couldn't block. All my Eldrazi Spawn pinged him. Then, the following turn, I had a Pennon Blade out. I used my Goblin Tunneler to make my Goblin Arsonist unblockable, then equipped the Pennon Blade on it, then swung with my new 8/8 unblockable and my 6 0/1 pingers.

The fun part is that I didn't even plan for this type of interaction during deck-building. It just sort of happened when I looked at the board state, and was like "Oh!"

The interaction I did plan for was Goblin Tunneler, Zof Shade, then pump the Shade. Sadly, this never came to fruition.

[Jamfalcon]

Okay, settle in and get ready for a bit of a long one, just got back from a particularly crazy game.

Let me paint you a picture. Four player commander/planechase game. I'm running a more or less new Nekusar deck (had one previously, but it was just thrown together). My opponents are an aggressive Maelstrom Wanderer, a super effective Brago, King Eternal, and a Karador, Ghost Chieftain deck that's won both previous games I'd played against it.

So I'm doing okay, getting a kind of slow start Brago is keeping things on lock-down pretty well. I'm not really getting a chance to play my commander, and the planechase deck is pretty much keeping me from gaining much ground beyond protecting myself. As the game goes on, things start to shift towards the Karador player. But eventually I draw, in one turn, my three big, exciting black cards. Army of the Damned, Decree of Pain, and Rise of the Dark Realms. I'm sitting around seven mana, and realize if I can play them back to back, in that order, I'll be in a tremendous place.

That promptly becomes less of an options, because we planeswalk to the Morphic Tide phenomenon, which drops me down to six lands and an armillary sphere. Not ideal. But, it also gives me a Runescarred Demon, and with that, the opportunity to do basically the best possible thing I could ever hope to attempt with this deck. So I search up my recently acquired Omniscience.

I have to sit on the plan for a while, thankfully with a Spellbook to keep me from trying to hold onto four cards I couldn't play. I get use the armillary sphere to get up to eight lands and play out a Baleful Force. As the turn is passed around, the Karador player almost has the other two dead, but he likes drawing cards off of me and is saving me for last. I am quite okay with this. Baleful Force draws me the lands I need, but of course it takes two turns until I can get the second one out.

I have to hide the fact that I'm looking up Omniscience on my phone to double-check the rules on some interactions, try not to let onto the fact that I'm suuuuper excited and hoping nobody messes up my plan. It finally gets to my turn, and I announce "okay guys, you're going to want to play close attention to this turn."

Drop Omniscience. Cast Army of the Damned. They look a bit worried. I put out three other creatures I had in hand that don't help me too much right away. Cast Decree of Pain, and thanks to my decent defence, the zombies, and Karador's sizable army, I draw 28 cards. Then I go right into Rise of the Dark Realms, and, well... here's my mess of a board state: (I hadn't had a chance to sort it all out yet)


For a glorious five minutes I try to figure out if there's any way I can win. Thing is, I don't have haste. I have Swiftfoot Boots, and one mana open. I decide to put it on the Vish Kal, Blood Arbiter I stole from Karador, so that I can sacrifice some creatures to him, kill a player, and gain a ton of life. Karador's player managed to kill him (and I forgot I had some counters in hand that I could play for free...) so I had to pass the turn.

Maelstrom and Brago couldn't make much of a splash, though I made the dumb mistake of countering Maelstrom himself, when he really wasn't even close to a threat. On Karador's turn, he plays Divine Reckoning. Because I countered Maelstrom, I only have one counter left (that'll work for this) and have to let it resolve, since he can just flash it back anyhow. I keep a Necrolpolis Regent I stole from him after some agonizing.

After that it's my turn again. With Omniscience still out, I manage to draw myself some more creatures, and between them, the Regent, and a Manor Gargoyle, and one damage from a replayed Nekusar and my Temple Bell, I kill off Brago and Maelstrom. Just Karador left, and he's at 36. (I'm at 40, thanks to getting a Resolute Archangel from Brago's graveyard with Rise of the Dark Realms.) I have my commander out, and 29 cards in hand still. Most are land, but there are five cards with my usual win condition: each player discarding their hand and drawing some number. I have 25 cards left in my library. I just drew Niv-Mizzet, the Firemind. Well then.

So I actually have to get my hand to be smaller, without shrinking my library. I play Skyscribing and Prosperity with X equalling 0, just to get rid of them, and blatently waste a couple other cards. Then I cast Whispering Madness, discarding 23. When he draws that many, Nekusar drops him down to 13, and when I get mine, Niv-Mizzet does the rest of the work.

And now I'm left wondering if it's time to just retire the deck, because it clearly is never going to surpass that game.

[AdmiralMemo]

Playing in a casual Standard game on MtGO today. I had Ulamog on the field under Suppression Bonds for several turns. I cast Breaker of Armies, which got hit with a counterspell, so it went to the graveyard. So I dropped Mortuary Mire, put the Breaker on top of my library, then cast Reality Shift on my own Ulamog to turn it into a Manifested Breaker.