A long time ago, the Earth was different. Strange beasts roamed a place that existed without boundaries or borders. If you or I had been there to see them the beasts would have seemed like gods, or maybe monsters. The beasts did not think of themselves as anything other than what they were. Their names were Ta’xet and Tia. Dzalarhons and Kaiti. They governed life and death, the volcanoes, the sea, and when new episodes of Commodore Hustle would be released.

OK, maybe not, but it has been quite a while since we released a full, non-Beej related episode of Commodore Hustle. In this episode, exciting and dangerous things happen, AND a convertible is driven. It’s basically the coolest thing we’ve ever shot, so go watch it!

This week is also exciting because Unskippable is back to JRPGs! Graham and Paul are riffing The Guided Fate Paradox. And a good thing too, otherwise the opening cutscene might be so boring its fatal. Tune in for part 2 next week!

And finally, this week’s episode of CheckPoint+ is Kickstopper. I’m back and we discuss things like Kickstarter completion rates, Need For Speed and joy of joys, we have more news about Final Fantasy XIII-3! Really, it’s the sequel that keeps on giving. 

Apologies all for the late LRR blog update! I was out of town this weekend down in Austin to compete in Geek Bowl VIII, the biggest, most exciting competitive trivia event in North America. I ran into a couple of Quizmasters who watched our videos, and the whole event was great fun. If you like doing trivia and there is a Geeks Who Drink quiz at a bar near you, I suggest you get a team together and check it out. Ok, that’s enough shameless plugging for my hobby. Now onto shameless plugging for our videos!

First up is this week’s LoadingReadyRun sketch, The New Chess. Paul has been kicking this idea around for a while, and I think we can all agree that in the age of Dota and LOL, balance issues are even more pressing than ever. Although multiball seems a little OP. I think we’ll need another patch to get that perfectly sorted out. Maybe they can fix it when they get to the pawn double-move bug you see at the beginning of the game.

Graham goes solo on this week’s CheckPoint+ Tales of Troubles, but 100 percent less Kathleen means Graham gets to deliver 100 percent more of the jokes! This week, we grapple with the next-gen console reality, hear about how the UK’s new pornography filters are having some unintended consequences (file under:  Department of We Fucking Told You So) and learn how Bandai Namco discovered the mystical alchemical secret behind turning gold to shit.

And finally, this week’s Unskippable is Killer is Dead. Now, I know Suda 51 games are usually pretty crazy, but honestly… this episode of Unskippable features one of the bigger “WTF just happened” moments I’ve seen in quite some time. And honestly, when an opening cutscene manages to be both 100 percent predictable AND completely unexpected… I think we have a winning formula. A winning formula for LAUGHS that is!

…

*crickets*

…

I’ll get me coat.

It’s Monday and that means it’s time for the new videos!

This week’s video is a return to an old favourite that many people have been clamouring to see. Yes! It’s Paul’s goatee The Warriors of Darkness! After five long years, the warriors are back! Their weapons may be sharp, but sadly for them, their minds are as dull as ever.

This week on Unskippable, Graham and Paul probably have some questions to ask about the nature of “action games” as they give a well deserved ribbing to Call of Duty: Ghosts. For a game that sort of depends on you thinking it’s exciting and fun to play, they sure have made a dull opening scene. Never before has a wayward space weapon seemed so… boring. Luckily Graham and Paul have plenty of ways to make this cutscene fun!

And remember, be sure to check out our Twitch channel at 2:00 pm Pacific/5:00 pm Eastern/10 pm UK/ 11:00 am Australian for the next episode of CheckPoint Plus. Last week we had far fewer technical issues, so hopefully we get it down to zero this week!

Our official spoiler video for the next Theros-block set is live!

This spicy sorcery from Born of the Gods is… what else, a five drop? It buffs your creature, but also brings friends, so that’s nice. Watch Graham break out his Slim Jim (™) voice to capture just how epic Raised by Wolves is.

It’s Monday and that means it’s time for the new videos!

This week we return to everyone’s favourite crackpot to hear his latest “mind blowing” truth about international finance in The Bitcoin Conspiracy. I don’t know if this video makes you more (or less) likely to consider investing in the cryptocurrency, but it should should make you wary of investing in a mobile van-based hacksman lair.

This week on Unskippable, Graham and Paul take on the grimy, dark, and darkly lit world of Game of Thrones. The opening cutscene is sadly entirely devoid of breasts and violence (aka, the things we like Game of Thrones for) but it is just packed full of men who look suspiciously like potatoes. So there’s that. Anyhow, the Night’s Watch seems to have some retention issues, but Graham and Paul are full of good suggestions for improving morale.

And remember, be sure to check out our Twitch channel at 2:00 pm Pacific/5:00 pm Eastern/10 pm UK/ 11:00 am Australian for the next episode of CheckPoint Plus. Hopefully with less technical issues!