To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

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Lyinginbedmon
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To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

Postby Lyinginbedmon » 26 Nov 2009, 16:56

I wrote this during a briefly lucid phase in the course of the last few days (Yup, Desert Bus for Hope season) and emailed it to the [email protected] account stickety-wicket, though I'm not sure it was ever read out (Lucid periods in DBfH season being brief as they are).

However, for the enjoyment of those recovering from the ordeal, here's my Desert Bus fanfic in full. So, enjoy, and good luck getting out of the insomnia and hallucinations phase.
To whom it may concern,

I am delighted to hear your concerns of me, so little do I hear them such, and your kind words, with such verbosity, are graceful in my ears.

I am a serial, you know? Of course, you know. It is somewhat difficult to miss, I admit. Heh.

All serials have their territories, I have mine. It stretches eight hours at top speed on the old girl. From shiny city to dusty desert, no-one ever goes there. Simply put, all anyone does there is “pass”.

People don’t like to stick around long there; they hate to see me stop. Always making me keep on going, bribing me if they must. Another hour, another bribe, another victim sitting pretty in the back.

I do love the honesty of my pretties. So willingly do they hitch a ride with me, so calm. Some are a bit…nervous, I think, but they come along like the others. People hate to see me stop, but like filthy silent voyeurs they love to watch me go. Soon enough, they all come along for a ride with me.

People don’t like to stick around long here, it’s my territory. And not much stays here for long. Just dust, and bushes, and dirt, and bugs. Well…not too many bugs anymore. Heh.

No-one ever finds them, so I’ve no worry for you reading this. No-one likes to stick around long here, but occasionally folks do wonder why people keep hitching rides with me. It’s so difficult to miss, I admit.

No matter, no-one ever gets found after I’m finished with them. It’s a long walk back, but the people keep me pretty, keep the old girl running. ‘cept of course when she don’t run, had a few wild nights I admit. Who hasn’t? It’s a long trip, you’ve always got to keep yourself…entertained.

So meet the tow truck guy a bit, filthy voyeur that he is. Caught me with the pretties in the back a few times too. Heh. They pay me to keep moving, and I pay him to shut his filthy mouth and get the old girl running again, and soon enough he shuts up and she gets running.

I hear you’re going on a trip, probably left already by the time this reaches you. Good, I do prefer to spout my little rants to folks in person, gives it a nice personal touch.

See, all the serials have got this little “pattern”, their “modus operandi” I think it’s called. Some go quick, some go slow, and some, like me, go very, very, slow. Four hours, six? Heh. I love to hear the pretties in the back squeak and squeal. They make such lovely noises. And I love to have my fun in the old girl.

Well, looks like I’m coming to another bus stop. Heh. No-one ever gets on at them, people don’t like to stick around here long. I ain’t stopping, they pay me to keep going.

Worked it out yet? Surprised? No, I expect not, it is somewhat difficult to miss…

I am the bus driver. I run the Desert Bus.

And no-one, ever, gets off.
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Re: To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

Postby Lyinginbedmon » 04 Dec 2009, 01:34

Nothing? Seriously?

:(
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Re: To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

Postby Alja-Markir » 04 Dec 2009, 01:35

It's....

*checks his clock*

It's late at night and I can't comprehend the actual time. Check back in the morning.

~Alja~
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Re: To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

Postby Arius » 04 Dec 2009, 01:38

Lyinginbedmon wrote:Nothing? Seriously?

:(

Fine.

tl;dr
H̼̮̖͓̻ͮ̀ͬ̓e̟̦͉̾̔̀ͣ͆̄ ͚̤̈̉ͦ̎ͭ̚c̰̠͚̜̹ͪ̐̎̃ͅo̗͌͛ͥ͑m̍ͬͥ̚e͍̱̲̤͚̹͔͛s͚̱̤͚̲̭̗̃̎ͭ̚.̘̫̖̮̠͒̔.̝̹̟̳͚̂̆̋͌̐̚.̬͓̰̃̑
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Re: To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

Postby Fraszoid » 04 Dec 2009, 08:32

Might just be my interpretation, but is the driver a serial killer, that just picks up people and kills them to sustenance and money to keep the bus runnig so he can endlessly drive between Tuson and Las Vegas like some ferry man on the river Styx? It was rather interesting to read, and seems kind of twisted, but thats just my interpretation.
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Re: To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

Postby Lyinginbedmon » 04 Dec 2009, 09:05

Fraszoid wrote:Might just be my interpretation, but is the driver a serial killer, that just picks up people and kills them to sustenance and money to keep the bus runnig so he can endlessly drive between Tuson and Las Vegas like some ferry man on the river Styx? It was rather interesting to read, and seems kind of twisted, but thats just my interpretation.

That's pretty much what I was going for. We don't ever learn anything about the Desert Bus driver, just that something compels him to drive continuously without end between Tucson and Las Vegas.

So at first, he seems harmless, he's just giving people rides. And then I thought, "maybe he does it for a reason". And the immediate two that arrived is that either no-one wants him around or there's something in the desert that is necessary for him.

And considering how much of our lives Desert Bus for Hope subsumes, there's really only one thing it could be: He's a rather clever and twisted serial killer, and people pay him to keep going because they don't want to be next. Obviously, there's no damning evidence he's a serial killer (He's smart enough to pick somewhere nobody goes to dump the evidence and definitely smart enough not to outright say so in the letter), else he'd be imprisoned Hannibal Lecter-style, but precisely how harmless he appears and his occupation is possibly what makes people kinda nervous around him.

Though really, here we have the driver telling us about his job, we don't hear much about the towtruck operator, but he's someone the serial killing driver thinks is perverted...
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Re: To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

Postby Annchan » 04 Dec 2009, 09:14

Arius wrote:
Lyinginbedmon wrote:Nothing? Seriously?

:(

Fine.

tl;dr


Sorry, me too....
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Re: To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

Postby Master Gunner » 04 Dec 2009, 09:28

I read it. Interesting. Could have used more slash.
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Re: To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

Postby DmitriW » 04 Dec 2009, 11:54

...you're sure this was written during a lucid span during DBfH season? >_>

Seriously though, you nail the crazy-rambling that I'd expect from a psychopath...perhaps a bit too well. ¬_¬
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Re: To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

Postby Lyinginbedmon » 04 Dec 2009, 17:34

Well we already knew I'm legally insane.
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Re: To whom it may concern... [A Desert Bus fanfic]

Postby GreigKM » 04 Dec 2009, 17:42

Too long, I can't comprehend statements of more that 3 sentences before blacking out and falling into a murderous rampage... on TF2.
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